Alchemy and Vellum
By: Star of Atlantis
The alchemy of your words
soft spoken near vellum
are still falling in...
did I hear truly...
or have my ears betrayed?
With your tongue you've flayed
me to lick at my heart
and drink the essence of my soul
your breath so close
all warm and gentle with your rays
You crawl into my hiding places...
drawing me out
like a disintegrating tide,
where I feel naked
beyond vulnerable...
Afraid your fingertips
will trace over the scars
someone else left
underneath my perfect
porcelain skin
Your kiss a gentle invitation
imploring that I open up
and summoning me to believe
that the words you've said
really are 'I love you passionately!'
Author notes
Written April 12th, 2006
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Excellent title. Sensitive, anxious write portraying self-doubt after mistaking a selfish passion for loving commitment. Beautiful metaphors. Great imagery in "you crawl into my hiding places...drawing me out" and "I feel naked beyond vulnerable."
So many deep scars souls carry are invisible. Painful "underneath my perfect porcelain skin."
Hope dances with Fear, and we must choose who leads.
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wow what a compliment that you found faith in this poem thankyou fro expressing this to me it truely touches me. i am glad you liked the read thank you again.
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Passionate
Almost erotic, a wonderful love poem of a new love. My favorite line:
With your tongue you've flayed
me to lick at my heart
and drink the essence of my soul
your breath so close
all warm and gentle with your rays
You are a poet with much talent and express yourself superbly in this write.
Write On~
)O(
DragonBlue
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Sighs..
This write holds such wonderful faith...
Your langauge is so very lovely...
This is beautiful and a joy to read...
The last line holds so much passion...smiles
Many blessings to you..
~A~
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fantastic variation of emotional scars, it tickled mine with a pinch of salt and vinegar. you have recreated your character well, to doubt any incling that someone could love you, yet he found what you so desperately tried to hide. i loved the essence of humility and the heartaching torture to see yourself as a wounded animal fighting for survival. somehow faith restoring hope in truth of words so vital in a loving relationship. well done
peace out
jezz
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thank you so much for what you saw in this... i think i wrote this piece either just after or durring my devorce. it was started as a fridge poem, you know those magnetic kits that you stick to your fridge, well any way i didnt think it was fare for a new lover to find what the x left behing with his bites scratches and claws under my skin... and yet they always do how odd...and how lovely. i am glad that you saw it the way you did it means you probably have a scar or two on your heart and that means your probably better for it
thank you for reading and dropping in to leave me a comment i apperiate it very deeply
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Well done!
Certainly the chemistry here is mismatched but the poem
brings out why the Gold and parchment does not yield
yet within this write lies that wonderful sense of hope
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vellum is a fave word of mine... it has so many meanings and all of them are interesting ... its paper but a really soft kind and its skin... we write our poems on the page but the skin of our own lives is the world it creates and with just as much meaning. so i am glad that you gravitated to the simmilur idea in your reading. thank you for the comment and for stopping by to read.
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I sense the fear of being unloved, and doubting just enough to not want to reveal the vulnerability inside, afraid that past failures will destroy the new fragile love that's been found.
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i find it so interisting how a poem finds its own life in the reader and that it goes on its own journey. thank you for giving me some insite on the way you took it into your own journey as per its not the way i had seen it and i love it most when i can see an old friendly poem in a new light. thank you so much for reading and for stopping long enought to write me a little comment to go with your reading
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There's a certain feeling of even more openly exposed of heart,than in the flesh as you've expressed here.Vivid is the word that come to mind in reading this well crafted verse.
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thank you for the compliment of my words being vivid. i think poetry and the pen is just another way to paint the picture. so if its vivid to you then i must be a pretty fair painter. it is my deepest hope that the colors and textures of my penned art creates what i can do with paint bursh so much easier
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This is very lucid in its imagery.
I felt the gentle give and take as
if this is a very new feeling just
now being explored. Intimate throughout
in a tangible and intelligent way. Blue
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thank you for featuring me i am so very touched that you found something worthy of such an honer in my works. i am very touched and i blush at the complement that is to me. i am also pleased that when you read this poem you have taken it to a softer place. thank you once again and i am so very glad you like it
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i am glad you like this
thankx for stoopping by
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Excellent
Very nicely done. Wonderful lines to stir the mind! -
Lovely write, Gorgeous metaphors, very descriptive.
Well written..... -
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i am glad you stopped in to read it and i hope it kick started your muse and something great comes of it thank you for the comment and for reading
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