A life shrouded in secrets.
A life in hidden shame.
A life enveloped in shadows,
With no one else to blame .
A wraith upon my soul,
pungent upon my breath,
rots me from the inside.
A leash pulling me to death.
To live A life in lies,
a lie that knows no class.
Addiction is a curtain,
to hide us from the past.
This little bottle of pills,
to some may bring a cure.
Releases me from my pain,
its origin seems obscure.
I forever have been addicted
to kill the pain and lies.
I seem to have forgotten
the reason I first got high.
Alcohol or Valium,
Perkiset or Halcyon,
Methamphetamine and Morphine,
Demerol and Vicodin.
Whatever fix you want ,
whatever it may be.
You get it from you doctor,
from a friend or off the street.
My addiction has no reason
or at least I have forgotten why,
but every day is another quest
to find another high.
Addicts know the consequences
yet we lose control.
a marionette dangling by strings.
Addiction clouds my soul.
Today I sit and ponder.
I think of that one last breath
so many friends have taken,
while addiction lead them all to death.
Tomorrow all are forgotten,
just remembered as another junkie.
Lost amongst a forest of gravestones.
Nothing left in life but a tattered legacy.
A life shrouded in secrets.
A life in hidden shame.
A life enveloped in shadows,
with no one else to blame.
Author notes
Addiction controlls the lives of rich, poor, black, white, asian.. Addiction is blind and isolates you till your addiction is your best friend.
In memory:
Teddy Matkins, Dick Hillstad, Laura, Bobby, Kenny, and all the other faces that flash in front of my eyes, I wish I could remember their names but I was always getting high.
Added not in death physically but perhaps mentally is my Ex wife. May fate be gentle on her...
Never give up, don't add your name to the forgotten grave.
Written April 9th, 2006
A contest entry
- I've Got A Razorblade With My Name On It, And A Gun With Yours, I'll Say This Lasts Forever by xBeautifulxHellx.
400 points, ended September 16, 2006, 128 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Addiction by poetryality.
900 points, ended November 14, 2008, 24 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 41 of 41
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congrats on this poweful piece
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Aweome. Congrats on the bronze. I just don't know what to say about your poem, the message is a wake up call.
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A Pivotal work of poetry here poet. These words should scare the masses straight. I know your words tugged at my heart. At first we think everyone is to blame but us, then we see how we were in the grips of addiction, self-destructing.
An Excellent entry. Thank you! I wish you well in the challenge.
Much Love & Respect ♥
Renee
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Superb
This is an amazing poem. It has shows the purity of raw felt addiction. I connect to this poem on another level too, for I too have been in this position and have lost a dear friend this way. I am thankful to my undying Spirit which pulled me through my trying times, and I can only wish and pray the same for you.
Thank you for sharing this piece of writing.
Dimitri -
Thiis iis a really great wriite. II liiked iit a lot. Keep up the good work.
Soon to be queen but now stiill the...
Nubiian Priincess -
i like this poem. its inspirational to people who are lost and need to have a role model. keep up the writing, its a great catharsis.
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i really really like this poem. its got alot of...pain &&& past behind it. im in the same contest as you...and i wish you luck in this contest that never seems to end. its like every time i check to see if its over, its got 4 more days! lol but good luck. this is an amazing poem. keep it up.
---great write---
...perplexed... -
Great job done so very well I guess the bottom line is drugs = death period.
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Wow.. I can't say I never tried drugs, but I never got addicted, thank goodness.. I like to drink, and for awhile it was my life, but someone special helped me get out of that, just in time. This poem may be about drugs, but it could describe an alcoholic as well. Awesome job on this. AThena
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You have paid tribute to these people and through your works perhaps their deaths will not be in vane. Excellent piece.
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I thank thee for the awesome birthday present!! Thanks for the gold and the recognition.
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Congratulations on your gold. I just wanted to wish you well
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I thank thee for the heartfelt reply. It seems that every time I get A large amount of points I promote these two poems for no reason but to influence A few people. Maybe the dedication will make one person think....
Just one. -
I myself have resolved all addictions but the old snake oil firewater. It saddens me to watch my old frinds rot away though.
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This is it!! The one reason I still write about the pain and loss of addiction! I hope someone reads your comment and thinks. I myself had A stroke at 19 and turned the tables just in time to watch my friends rot around me...
Thank you for this comment. -
*Wow* Clllllllllllllaps loudly. You really gave a good poem, this was really great readings and have bookmarked you just to do that. Great job on the contest much props given to you...
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Not bad. As in other subjects, this site seems to do well when certain of us focus, and thus shine.
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I don't support drug abuse, but at least you're aware that it's not fine. Your title was definitely entrancing and the background and font color you chose perfectly suit the mood of this poem.
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Nicely done love the subject, I see your getting your mind back.
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I liked it alot; but just when it started to flow real good it would stop and then flow again. Thanks for sharing and God bless.
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W rite ON!
MAN....I felt the despair like it was an hour ago in this. Years ago I was a substance abuse counselor and helped two people caught in the clutches of addiction so deep it seemed an endless well.
I worked with a guy named Hignio who was involved in the gang shooting of 3 innocent people in a small town in CA. and later turned his life around in prison after he attempted suicide in prison with alcohol poisoning.
One of the people was a heroine addict and the other was an amphetamine. I could relate to both having experimented with them but never felt the need for addiction to anything...
AWesome write... -
This is so true and I too have seen so many very good people but weak people consumed by drug addiction. Even if they aren't killed by it they are still never the same. Much props on your honest write here!
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I just wanted to thank you again for the well thought comments and critiques.
Thanks for the gold! -
It is the inability of the contaminated mind to understand the complexities of our addictions that stops us from over coming them. This was a very very good entry. Perhaps not the most beautifull in it's words or structure but the honesty and bluntness of who is to blame and the realisation of ones own cosen ignorance made this my favourite.
Thanks for entering and sharing. -
Well said!
Thanks for the great comment, it is nive when people put thought into them.. -
not being judgemental ..
as you say ..
Addicts know the consequences
yet we lose control
so the one to help out will be yourself .. while others could only giving loving support .. not everybody are mentally healthy or strong enough to face such eccentricities of addictions
Edited on Apr 13, 10:45 p.m. because ''. -
Bloody Well Done!!
WoW!!! This is Excellent!!!!! Vivid Clear and Powerful!! The perfect hatrick!!! Nicely Done!! Good Luck in contest!!! -
Thanks for reading, I feel that this write is more A message that speaks from the heart..
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I like the genuiness in sharing ..
this should be really a warning for others who lose their life, love and mind on drugs or alcohol addiction .. complicating even more the problems and sadness in their life ..
Edited on Apr 14, 9:47 because ''. -
drugs arent the answer...i rahter not air my dirrty laundry...my author page...talk about 4/28...suicide really doesnt solve any problems... my drugs were supposed to kill but apparently since im writing this to you...it hasnt worked yet. another great entry. i hope u do well. it isnt the answer i may also tell you, it only shows that u fell...
and roses as well 
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I can tell you the reason for people commiting A slow painful suicide through drugs as well I can give you the reason fire engines are red...
There are so many reasons why people start but twice as many reasons to quit.
Try opening A rusty lock with A toothpick... That is the best answer I can give. -
This was a well written poem. I found it to be very educational as well. Your words are clear ,analytical , descriptive, and very well put together. Your poem flows very nicely. This was a very enlightening poem! Thank you for sharing.
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For us who have never been there, or done that, this is quite a revaltion, something that we know nothing about. You are educating many of us, but not sure if we want to know , if you know what I mean. This is so tragic and is affecting so many people, do not know why they do this to themselves, Smart, intelligent kids should know what the results of doing this are, yet the still do this to themselves. This can't be all peer pressure and wanting to belong, sounds like lemmings all jumping off a cliff - like a cyclic thing. Really have no answer why. Can you help me try to understand even more? Not putting any one down, just think they should know better. And there is help out there for those who want to quit.
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Vicodin and beer. Yum. Nice piece. I saw the contest and couldn't think of anything for it. You've done a nice job. I especially like the line about forgetting why you got high in the first place.
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Great
I enjoyed this piece. I especially liked the reference that you made to an addict being nothing more than a marrionette on a string. That was a nice though and I have to admit that not many would have thought of this kind of methaphor. Great job with this one. -
I thank you for the positive comments and the chance to share.
For some this may be just another contest, for others who have personally seen countless lives destroyed, ending in death, prison, mental instability...
Now I'm rambling on, this is A subject that people could discuss for hours..
Thanks again.
Edited on Apr 10, 9:59 p.m. because ''. -
Gorgeous Words
Perfect, amazing imagery dressed in emotion that barrel rolls the mind. The portait of our physical weakness's imn the shadow of substance addiction is truly tremendous and carries an impact that led me back again and again to read it.
Your authors comments also touched a cord buried deep in my own experiences and consequences.
This is great writing, a gift to read.
Thank You for entering the contest.
E.A. -
Wow. This is extremely powerful. Everyone knows drugs are an addiction but you wrote this with such a fresh sound. I hope that you are successful in battling your demon drugs and I wish you good luck in the contest.
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That was very powerful. Sorry my comments have been short lately..just don't have much to say to anyone lately.
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wow this is so sad and true, all my ex's have been on one kind of drug or another. it hurts me to read this thinking of them constantly high. heres my favorite stanza
"A life shrouded in secrets
A life in hidden shame
A life enveloped in shadows
With no one else to blame" this on eis truly beautiful but the entire poem is wonderful
you have great talent good luck with your life
Never give in
Never give up
Wolfchick28 -
wow!what a thought! i love how youve portrayed yourself and converyed this powerful message..wonderful id say!i really loved reading it.. becuase it was totally worth it..keep them coming!cheers!
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