Trembling,
we the ragged dress
can no longer cling
to the huddling frame.
Hole by hole,
we lose
against the wind
and darkening season
leaving limbs shivering
and uncovered
in morning frost.
I, the ancient fabric,
moth-eaten and skeletal
fall, and leave
a naked form.
Author notes
Option One.
PoeticEmily just turned THIRTY.
Written April 6th, 2006
A contest entry
- Spaghetti and Sardines (did i get your attention? :) ) by PoeticEmily.
300 points, ended April 19, 2006, 3 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 57 of 57
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Thank you for the silver.
I'm glad you enjoyed the piece. I really enjoyed the ideas you gave us to write on for this contest. Thanks for a fun contest. 
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Wow, this piece has amazing description and so much feeling in such a short work. this flowed very well, the language was casual but not coarse, very well done. I love the clothing metaphor, it really fits the subject, and it fits the mood of the piece. Very very well done.
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Thank you
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i love your imagery from the material standpoint excellent job
michele -
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Just one of many which protect all that live beneath your beautiful cover
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Thank you. I'm glad ou enjoyed it.
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omigosh this is moving and beautiful and flowing and *tear*... its amazing...
you really took something not as beautiful and made it perfect. you're awesome. i really like the point of view. -
Thank you.
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Very nice write, well done and beautifully penned good luck in the contest
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Thanks, Deb. Always appreciate your thoughts.
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Exceptionally Well Done
Lovely description of a tree graciously returning to the soil from which she sprang. "Limbs shivering and uncovered..." Gave me goosebumps. Thanks for a sweet/bittersweet read, Stone. Deb
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Thank you, Sis. Well, I wrote it thinking metaphorically.
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Thank you.
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Thank you, snow!
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Thank you for your kind and thoughtful words. I always appreciate them, my friend.
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Thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed the piece.
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Glad you enjoyed it.
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Glad you enjoyed it and thank you.
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Thank you.
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Ah, I'm blushing, Auntie. Thank you for such sweet and wonderful words. They mean so much to me.
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That's an interesting challenge, Elscripto. I like it.
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Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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Thank you!
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Thanks, Val.
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Thanks, ethereal. This was an interesting one to write. An interesting frame of mind to be in.
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Thanks, Di.
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Thank you, dear Pixie.
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this is wonderfulyl written, but i'm wondering if is figurative or whether you jsut wrote it literally?? I know that anyone can interpret a poem how they want, but how did u write it?
good luck in the contest. Oh, the poem flowed really well and was a pleasure to read -
Wonderfully written. Good luck in the contest!
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Beautiful poem. Great imagine you have put in my mind. Great poem and beautiful written Good luck in the contest you in.
Wish you the best
snow
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WONDERFUL POEM MY FRIEND
This is just beautiful my friend, sometimes we are left open and easily set upon by bad and sad things.
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great poem! I really enjoyed reading this piece. it was very creative!keep up the good work!
God Bless,
OnlyInMyDreams -
nice picture painted in my mind, thanks for that
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Oh I think this was a pretty good one. I think I will give it applause since it is one of the better ones I have read today.
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Fantabulous!!!!!
Liz, WOW This is fantabulous my dear sweet niece. You provided very vivid imagery through your personification.
It flowed so peacefully and yet had an eerie feeling to it.
This is amazing, I have read it 4 times now and want to read it again. Before I do I will leave you with a standing ovation to go along with my applause. Love you always, Auntie Joyce
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I love the imagery in this piece. It's really well done, great word choice. Although lately...I am reading a lot of poems about trees and they all seem to have to do with bare, leafless trees. I wonder if you'd ever write a poem about a tree in full bloom? I'm sure you'd do a great job on it...I would do it but...I'm not much of a nature sort of writer...maybe I'll give it a try, but I definitely think you should! Just a suggestiong. But anyway, this poem is terrifico. Keep it up and thanks for sharing!
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Damn great poem, I haven't had the pleasure of reading your other works...but I will.
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inspiring
It was beautiful, with lovely imagery. Good luck! -
What a beautiful way to discribe autumn leaves falling and leaving a naked tree.Your poem needs no editing at all. Well done and good luck in the contest.Val
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excellent
Your imagery is very good in this poem. I like the way you are speaking as the leaf. You have done a really good job on this one Stone. Best of luck in the contest!
etherealforu
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Hi very different to your usual writes, I liked this a lot,good phrasing and nice flow, all the best in the comp, this poem should do well, hugs Di
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A nice piece dear pixie friend.
Wish you luck in the contest.
Shahrzad
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Thanks, grannyeri. The thought of yuor applause is appreciated all the same.
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Thank you very much.
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Thank you for your comment.
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Very creative write you have penned here - thinking outside the box. Personification rules in this poem. Liked the brevity of the lines and the images created by the words you have woven together. Well done. If I had 7 points, I'd applaud. Just a standing ovation!
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outstanding...it has exceptional flow and vivid imagery. A very enjoyable read. Great job.
Rory -
this is how i feel when i am in the forest. and on my forest walks i always hope to flow into a waterfall keep writeing beauty and keep the ink flowing on recycled papaer
love the papa -
Thank you, Jeff. Your continued support really means so much to me.
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Brilliant, your imagery is outstanding as usual...Jeff
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Thank you.
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real nice show of poetry done here love the flow of each lanes job well done thanks for sending the link
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Thank you, Angel of wolves!
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Absolutely beautiful, my friend! Very well done!
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Thank you, Rowan! I'm glad you liked it.
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I think this is one of the best ones I've read of yours! This is absolutely brilliant, the imagery is so eery and beautiful! What an awesome poem to read upon waking for me! This is some very very fine work!! Wow!
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