Snuggling in the orbs of emerald illusion,
caressing the temptations in olive hues;
Our tender curves swirl in aqueous fusion.
Silky scales glide tinging the ocean blues,
tickling my she-spine in watery bubbles;
Caressing the temptations in olive hues.
Salaciously in the sync of fervid doubles,
she fiddles with the luring vaginal vibes;
Tickling my she-spine in watery bubbles.
The nibbling moves amid sea-shelled tribes,
stirring the labial saliva along my shorelines;
She fiddles with the luring vaginal vibes.
The veins of lust ripple the azure twines,
swaying in the minty whirlpools of teal;
Stirring the labial saliva along my shorelines.
Our pink bosoms pout for the thirsty zeal,
Snuggling in the orbs of emerald illusion.
Swaying in the minty whirlpools of teal,
Our tender curves swirl in aqueous fusion.
Author notes
My first attempt for a Subtle lesbian erotica
it's empty tonight'
to know more about Terzanelles
www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/types.html
Painting by
www.daviddelamare.com/mermaids.html
Written April 4th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- Gay & Lesbian Erotica! by SinningSaint.
355 points, ended September 29, 2007, 11 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
gorgeous.
your descriptions were totally vivid, I could picture every move you described. I love how you took the topic & made it so orignal wit hthe whole underwater theme, it was brilliant. great job, thank you for entering! -
WOW, the under-sea imagery was absolutely amazing.. crazy beautiful! And the subtle lesbian erotica wasn't so bad, either
-
greatr
The words entailed within this subtle work are simply beautiful. Good luck in the contest. I hope that you will continue writing and have a wonderful day! -
Wow very different but great. Subtle but very effect. Great job. Best of luck in the contest.
-
This is wonderful Ankeeta. Beautiful infact. Being a lesbian myself I found this very alluring and enjoyable to read. You captured all the right thoughts and feelings. Well done my love.
xXxPurexXx -
sizzling!
gorgeous and very outspoken first attempt heehee...well for this being some of the initial ones wowwww!!!!..
....I am not one to raise any stone against any kind of sexual orientation, yet the way you penned this has made a very refined and polished wonderful imagery of the warmth any kind of love and skin warmth can be shared by two persons...with an original frame around the watery evanescence of oceanic descriptions! right on!!
-
Aila!
Erotica aur woh bhi lesbian?
Kya baat hai?
Okay, ahem, it really IS a subtle erotica, not really in-your-face kinds and not at all lewd. Superb write...and I LOVED the erotic imagery.
All the best in the contest.

Edited on Apr 06, 5:33 p.m. because 'stupid, stupid, STUPID typos
'.
-
thanks yaar!!...well sab bhagwan ki marzi hota hai!!
...oh no i mean it's all about the way you percieve things
..uhmm is that what we call as imagination
-
well coughs this one is... subtle.. it really is. You've done an amazing job over this. I can never think of such poetry..
damn... ur words are just so suitable and errroottiicc.. and the pic surely adds to it..
nice and superb errotic write.. I was unable to feel that its ur first attempt.. u've wriiten it as a proffesional kita.. good job.. keep up sweetie..
-Neha -
you can still write the story..who knows your story might be interesting than mine
-
it's funny that I was attempting to write something similar in nature (only story) but was procrastinating. I guess the early bird gets the worm. I'll do it eventually.
I think this was wonderfully written, you have such a beautiful ability with descriptions. It's always interesting when someone who doesn't predominantly speak english appears to write more eloquently in my own language than I do. hehe. I liked very much how your descriptions of the mermaids' sexual acts were also metaphors for the sea that they lived within. I think that the setting you painted helped to make this all the more visual. -
I just wanted to say that I really like this poem , Keep up the good work you are a very talented author and good luck in the contest
~Chrissy~ -
wow really kind of different and unique in a way.. i like how youve made it so graceful..nice entry..
-
too erotic!
wow amazingingly beautiful. . .you are so crafty with your words! -
bisexual!!
yeh it's boring job to be a vanilla all the time
well thank you for the comment
and yes getting obssesed with mermaid
arent they a delight?
Ankita
Edited on Apr 05, 10:07 because ''. -
Pretty impressive Ankita ..Never knew that u are bisexual
jk. Wellyou have very good command on words and u use them very imaginatively..the use of She-spine is very unique and impressive.though I dont have much taste for erotica butIguess I liked it..( So mermaid the word for season?
jk )
-
yes my darling
you are my inspiration
...you know am a freaking lazy bone when it comes to read books
..So I went through few of your poems to check out the style, language, metaphors used in eroticas
thanks yaar
your work tempted me to put something like this
Ankita -
Stirring the labial saliva along my shorelines.
oooh now this was a mind blowing line...very very visual but still so tasteful!! the word shorelines does seem familiar though
anyway Ankita...I dont think anybody would have guessed that this is your first attempt at writing adult poetry...its absolutely gorgeous...im very very impressed
you seem to have a vivid imagination just like some of us
-
oh damn my bad luck!!!
-
very good
Well you did a very good job writing this piece. You have very well choice of vocabulary. I liked this piece, but it's not what I was looking for. I'm not one for things like this, but I'm still glad you entered my contest. Thanks so much
Keep up the amazing writes
lots of love
~~Tori~~
-
Not bad for an attempt
You're very good, my friend...at all you do
-
oh thank you heather..well I wanted to this erotic piece a new angle by adding a mermaid which is quite delicate ans sensual theme and am glad that it worked out
thanks again
Ankita -
This has got to be a winner, and d'ya know why? Because it's sensually erotic, not in your face. It's beautiful and tender, with fantastic imagery and such gorgeous choice of words. It's unusual because they're mermaids not humans which adds even more to the poem (as if it needs it!) I really think this is a fantastic piece of poetry, it shows up a lot of people, myself included! Thanks for sharing this, best of luck, take care, Heather x
-
Incredible work
Very well penned! This is quite the little image you've painted here with your poem...
You word choice was unflawed and the flow was amazing... which is awesome considering the subject. This really is a piece of artwork.
Ciao Bella
-
Only idiots wouldn't love you dear, and I am no idiot
But, true
your form stuff makes me think O.O DANGERRRRR O.o Lol
<3 -
Oh damn lil one..atleast YOU don't say that
...as it is I have very few people who love me
anyways thanks for that sweet comment
and oh it took few mins to understand it?...well don't you know only my poems force your brains to think
ciao
Ankita
-
Y'know what Kita sister. . ? I HATE YOU!! runs off to the corner crying
You have such beautiful skill at writing. As always, dearest, great job. . . And this is an interesting form. . . Never seen it. . . It took me a few minutes to catch it, lol. . . I love it
-
Our pink bosoms pout for the thirsty zeal,
Snuggling in the orbs of emerald illusion.
Swaying in the minty whirlpools of teal,
Our tender curves swirl in aqueous fusion.
very good writing, it was great to read, enjoyable, subtle and worth the applause, all the best of luck. -
Yes, yes, very subtle!!!
you appear to me like an ace at writing erotica! Fantastic job done!!! Great picture to go with it! Should be a winner!
Lencio -
wow. very beauilful.lovely picture too. you dod very well if this is your first. beautilful langaueg. not at all crude..'
jess

















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