The apple of my eye
The light in my sky
With a heart of velvet lace
Her body is a watered vase
Your personality
In more ways than one
Is a prideful rainbow
Yet your light dims quickly
Within a cave of shadows
Fire burns through to show
The crease in my pants
The rain on my plants
With the skin of morning dew
Her beauty is a species anew
Pisces forgive
Love, disagree, come together
To be an oak tree
Struck down by lightning
Yet ashes turn to dirt
Turn to you and to me
Author notes
I chose option one.
This is about me and my girlfriend Jessica, about how we have our problems. But we always overcome them to strengthen our relationship.
Written March 23rd, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- You Choose You DON'T Lose by WorstNinjaEver.
400 points, ended April 2, 2006, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Awww. I really do adore your writing. It makes me smile. These are really cute and flow really well. I like how you can express yourself. Keep it up dear.
Love always,
Kristen ♥ -
this is a g-g-gorgeous write. it is actually one of your better ones, and i am so truly proud of you. the rhythum and the rhymes are superb, and the metaphors are quite good. i love this poem so much, congratulations, call me, and keep writing!
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Clever, dancing word play. Entertaining imagery and message rich. Great Work, keep it up.
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Thsi is a great peice of work! I love the word play and soaring imagery. For being only 13, you have an apparent gift. I can't wait to read more!
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Very nice use of metaphors and comparisons.I think this was a great love poem with nice flow and a great sense of love towards its subject.
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1 - 5 of 5
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