A man pastes honey on his eyelids
before going to bed
to dream ants and spiders.
In the morning his eyes weave
webs of silver and gold,
and mind stretches wings.
Each evening flying
with the birds his mind enters
itself in a golden cage lit
by honey lamps.
Author notes
Written March 21st, 2006
A contest entry
- Gold by Vera Rich.
300 points, ended May 9, 2006, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A GLASS OF VIRTUAL CHAMPAGNE by Vera Rich.
390 points, ended April 3, 2007, 38 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Best Poem You Have Ever Written by Cherokee.
300 points, ended July 31, 2008, 36 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 35 of 35
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This is so simple and a lovely way of expressing how we get our writes.
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I enjoyed this before, and am delighted to see it again... Your "virtual champagne is assured" - providing you leave it on the page until I have read the rest and judged the competition..
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Ethereal
Mesmerizing imagery, I don't quite understand all of it, but like the way it starts and ends with honey very much. I see you got the gold and you are well deserving. Thank you for a beautifully crafted read. -
good job
this is an interesting poem. good job -
Oh, yes...this is a delight to savour. A beautifully crafted web of images and words, all cast in a golden hue. Well done!
Here's my applause...
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I am so impressed by this write. What profound words and wisdom. How true. Loved this poem through and through.
Thank you so much for sharing!
Awesome.
J -
In agreement with some earlier posts, i dont really understand what it means, but i love the imagery. Vary well written though, adding to my favorites for sure.
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ys ive read this, i actually have this bookmarked. definitely deserves another applause. there was a contest a while back called Synaesthesia that i missed that i thought this fit perfedctly into. it was that contest and this poem that inspired me to write Infatuations. the imagery is surreal and mystical and perfectly "out of joint" that it keeps the reader off balance yet mesmerized. this is a beautiful piece. i hope you did or do well in this contest.
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Yes. Zayra is right as usual. This is an excellent poem.
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Vera is a smart lady. She has good taste in poets and their poetry. A very discerning eye.
Congratulations on winning the Gold!!! Yeah!
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Way to go - congratulations on winning gold in this contest about gold. Very deserving win you have penned here - such a different way to interpret this world and use it in a poem.
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I have the revision (even changed the title to Golden Cage tentatively)
Edited on May 09, 7:18 p.m. because ''. -
I look forward to seeing the revised version eventually, and in the meantime am giving this version an "applaud".
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I agree with your observation, and pointers to a large extent. I will revise it at a later time (after your comp gets over) and send across for your consideration (in case you want to publish).
Thanks for the comment, let me trepidate on this, further, to see how I can revise.
D
Edited on May 05, 3:46 because ''. -
There is some lovely material in this poem.... But, alas, for me it spoiled by the title, and the final let-down of the leaking water tap. If you were to end the poem at "honey lamps", and to change the title, you would have a very fine piece indeed - and one that I should be delighted to publish.
For this competition, however, the allusion to gold was perhaps not sufficiently brought out. (But PLEASE do not withdraw it until I have finished the judging - which will probably be early next week. This is only the "presort" stage).
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The use of metaphors was very well done.
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awesome
Yeah this has a nice flow but other than that....I have no idea what it was aboot. Keep writing, I can't wait to attempt to read more. LOL. Peace and Love Charlene
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I like that quote "Poetry is emotional masochism". Thanks for your encouraging words.
D -
o i love this this is great i strive to write like this someday. there is a surrealism to your imagery that is dreamy and captivating. you have it posted as humor but i am mesmerized by your words that maybe i missed the joke of it cause to me it entrancing. there was a contest last week called Synaesthesia, this would have fit perfectly into it. this is the best imagery ive read on this site hands down. i get tired and bored of someone telling me the sky is blue that i already know it is. this poem puts me in a completely differnt world which is exactly where i want to be when i read poetry.
this is gold in my opinion. -
love the metaphor in this one, Inkwell, at least the interpretation I gave to the metaphor in my read of this poem. and if I am in any way correct by my interpretation, I'm ready to just pour a great big jar of honey--(and another of honeybees) so the meaningless cannot be scribbled and maybe they can read a book on plumbling to see HOW to fix a leaking water tap before oozing more drone-stuff.
now, my interpretation may be all wrong, but I liked reading it this way!
Jo -
wonderful
i really like it...it gives me a very odd feeling of something... but im not really sure what it is.... -
Ethereal, yet solid. And the end makes me feel a candlelit sadness. Differently beautiful.
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I dunno what this poem means and a rotten ignoramus comments,for come I may but comment I must.
Mind enters itself is confusing and then my cranial reserves fail me over here for average intelligence this far far away.I am sorry Shubs -
This piece was beautiful and held a lot of metaphors! It is quite hard to understand contemporary writes, for the author usually has their own meaning planted deep inside, and we can only guess what it means. Somehow, I seemed to understand this piece a bit more. Maybe it is the fact that I have been on AP for a bit.
Well, I liked the imagery, the scientific sense that was made within this piece, and am grateful that you shared your magnificent writing with all of us on AP! Keep up the great work and keep writing! -
Great piece it made me smile. Loved the imagry and the whole feel of this piece. even in it's brevity it said alot. The metaphors were great as was the whole piece, nice contempory piece of writing. Great job. Keep your pen flowing!
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Wow, what surreality, what images! thanks for sharing something so laced with imagery, so palpable.
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this is quite interesting..never seen anything like it before. i love the bit about honey - been told it catches more bees than vinegar. It seems almost fantasy inspired like the movie, Big Fish.
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excellent use of imagery in this poem. It was one I had to think about, but that made it all the more interesting. A very original and creative poem. Good job!
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Ok, well this is definitely contemparary. Like madeofashes said, you have to read this more than once to completely understand this piece. I am one for metaphors and similies and understood the comparison at first, but the poem as a whole didn't make since at all. So I re-read the poem again and found different meanings in each part. Keep up the great work and thanks for sharing. Kahy
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i read this at first and didn't quite know what to think. then i read it again and thought it was the most beautiful thing ever. just the imagery in the second...half? of the first stanza was so lovely and beautiful ^^ the ending was sad, in a way. i'm not so sure why. i think it was the word "meaningless" that just made me feel so sad and such compassion for the man...some of the metaphors and such in it kind of reminded me of some of the things i write sometimes. amazing job, keep up the good work. <3
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wonderful dreamlike quality..imagination flying like a spraying hose....
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Drip, drip, drip and it goes on and on. Cute comparison you have made here - it's all meaningless you say?
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great
Short but to the point. And has very vivid imagry even though it is short. That's good. Great poem. Really good. -
Within seconds of reading this piece i could feel the corners of my mouth turning into a HUGE smile. Great work.nicely written. X
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wow, i didnt know contemporary meant nonsense. well, great job at that, nevertheless...
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