Raid
The rain came down in buckets,
Upon the midnight jungle floor.
My stalking eyes were fixed,
Upon the guard beside the door.
Inside the hut the VC lay,
In sleep, and homeward dream.
Knowing not that in the rain,
Lurked a Special Forces team.
Hand over mouth to hush his scream,
My blade deeply in his chest.
Blood spattered on my painted face,
I put the hapless guard to rest.
Explosives planted beneath the huts,
For when we make our getaway.
Then off to seek our comrade,
They had captured yesterday.
He was setting in the court yard,
Impelled on a two foot bamboo stake.
He had been there for hours,
Until death gave him a break.
The look was frozen on his face,
Of agonizing and tortured pain.
I could not hold the tears back,
Even now they flow again.
Spawned by despair and hatred,
Sometimes Jekyll turns to Hyde.
Something inside turns to fury,
Brutality sucks away your pride.
We turned the cranks and blew the camp.
No VC troop was spared.
We killed with anything we had,
With rage and no one cared.
But sometimes at night I hear them,
With their pleading and their screams.
They were soldiers and that was war ,
But now they haunt me in my dreams.
P.N.
Author notes
Opt KILL, we did.
A contest entry
- Whatever Floats Your Boat! by Heavenly Angel.
310 points, ended March 22, 2006, 15 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Intense moments by UaMeadhra.
300 points, ended December 16, 2006, 10 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - dark and sick poems by mylilpunchki.
400 points, ended February 25, 2007, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - because i feel like it.... (options) by VerminVomit.
1300 points, ended November 2, 2008, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Sadness, Anger and Hurt by piccola.
900 points, ended March 31, 30 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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This is what I call full on truth that speaks and shows just what war can come to and what things happen. Seems to me these viet cng deserved exactly what they got. The brutality that they made other endure was not even human. The emotions you put into this piece really were so real and I was shown in image the horror you spoke off, even if not what you saw for real. This write is the witness to the sorrows that linger in the mind and a war that won't go away. This is bookmarked. It is hard to comment on such a piece because of its truth but I can tell you, it certainly painted a picture. Trophy's given for this was marvelous.
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Thank you Lee. It is something i will never forget. How could I...
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job well done. I have a friend from high school who says he feels guilty because he didn't die in viet nam when so many of his friends did.
I wrote a poem for him and that situation.
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I like to read the poem you wrote. Theres a lot of us who wondered why them and not me.
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Touches The Heart!!!
I had to come by and look this one up. It touches deep into the soul of the reader. War is hell on earth. You describe how it is so well. You paint a picture of bravery and honor among you and your fellow green berets. Losing a friend is always tough but to lose him this way has to be unbearanle to remember. It must have been hard to write about. Thank you for sharing your deep sad feeling. Bless you my friend.
Always,
Sandy
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Wow i thought that this piece was a very powerful and amazing piece. You have a lot of talent. Good job and keep up the good work.
Lindsay -
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Thank you
But i'd like to read the poem that made your hair stand up like that.. hehe
Hope it wasn't mine.. hehe
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That's definitely one of the most intense moments anyone can have in their life. Good on ya for putting rime to it.
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Thank you.
Loseing a friend in war is bad enough. But we were w team of 12 Green Berets, and were very close. And the way he died made it so much worse. Setting and mashing someone down on a 2 ft bambo spike and leting them die slowly.. That was to much for us. We kinda went wild..
And thank you for your comment.
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Thank you Desire.. But it wasn't good enough to win, but i just needed to put it out....
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Sad but Needed to be Said!
Oh P.N.
Thank You for sharing this and I imagine it was hard
to type...especially with foggy eyes...
-see now I can't type- Darn
I know Friends of mine still to this day cannot talk about
experiences of what happened behind the lines...
It takes a certain amount of strength (energy)
and time...
to heal wounds....
Talking about it helps...
Appreciate You my Friend!!
You are loved
Many blessings to You always
Best wishes too
and much love~ Desire~*~
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I didn't know which brake or break to use. To stop the pain, or to give him a way out of it by death.
Sometimes its hard to type with foggy eyes. -
I love the way you openly share the experience. Very powerful write that definately takes the romantic factor out of war and puts it in the realm of reality. The poem is quite graphic, but with a strong story and points to be rememberred and considerred by the reader.
Very well done. Oh, just one thing. In this line
Until death gave him a brake.
Unless you meant a play on words with the spelling of brake, you may have intended the word break. Break would be like taking a break. Brake would be like to stop. Either would work and the spelling you used would definately be different from the anticipated. So I like the effect regardless of which was intended. -
Thank you Tairs. Some things you never forget.
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very deep,well written.
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It was a sad time. One i can't forget. Thanks Angel.
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Very very well done, my friend! Intense and powerful! Thank you for sharing and for entering the contest! Love and hugs, Sandy
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Thanks
It was a bad time in my life.... Lost a great friend.
We had a 12 man team, and were very close. He was one of the best.
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