emotions play hide and seek

Hiding they are, in the crevices
Of this moss-covered walls
Of my heart,
Tormenting, hinting their existence,
Stunting my growth
But  not going far.
Just a feeling, a perception,
Though all may say it's wrong;
It's my vision, what I see,
What I feel...what I've lived.

If only I could find a way
To make it go away...

Here it is, in my heart,
Scattered through its pieces,
Its assaulted chambers...
Blood runs with no sense of direction;
There is no reason, no function:
It now lacks purpose...
It only carries the poison
Infecting my wounds beyond healing,
The only pain reliever
Found under my heavy lids...

If only the vines had grown thorns,
My prince wouldn't have breached my heart...

The reaction so profound,
There is nothing more to feel,
No intensity, just embers...
And the embers still hold heat...
Waiting turns flesh into rock,
Failures bring them from hiding,
Poison surpassing any need.
Nothing ever really goes away,
Unless the opposite arrives,
Or at least they coexist...

And I shall pray for an antidote,
That recovers movement for my smiles...

They invade me, they retreat
Keeping my wound fresh... adding blisters
No one cares as I close my heavy lids.

No will to die is worse than not wanting to live.
As in ice, it's all preserved;
Madness is just putting sanity to sleep...