How can you do such a thing to your own daughter?
Only eight years old but she suffers things beyond our imagination
She says she enjoyed what you did to her
She says she liked it a lot
Boy, was that a lie
Look at her,
Lifeless and hopeless just like a dog
Waiting for the master to come home and take care of her
Is this what you did to your own daughter?
Just look at her
She's not here anymore
She's dead inside
She screams but no one can hear her
Is this what you mean by she's okay?
Is this what you mean by she's fine?
Is this an excuse you use for your own daughter?
She is your daughter not a Barbie doll or dogs you find in the parking lots!!!
Author notes
Written March 7th, 2006
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1 - 35 of 35
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This peice is awesome. The anger is very apparent, but it is justified. I do not think any human being should be treated in such a manor, most especially a child. Thank you for writing about this..
Rivkah -
I thought this poem was great but I'd work on the last line. It's a great though, but it just wasn't right to me.
Great write and good luck!
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Chase -
you really did a gd job on expressing what any normal humain being would think in this situation , and just putting shaer anger into words with only using exclamation points at the end . I really hope this never happened to you , nobabdy should have to go through that.
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Very good.
Very well written and it touched a personal chord in me... -
thank you for the comment and the help. I would try in my next poem. Thank you for the help and wish you the best
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Wonderful poem. The emotion is crisp and you provoke it very well. You know the girl has been abused, but how is hard to say. More detail would make this poem simply great, but, without it, it still gets emotion. Though, if you added a tad bit more detail I'm sure you could have people here relate to the poem that much more and it would be even more splendid than it already is.
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wow, this is deep! That is a terrible thing to happen to a child! That mother should be condemed to prison for life!!! This was a very deep poem! You do really good work, I am adding you to my favorets list
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Difficult to know how serious this is without knowing more of the detail. The emotional content of the poem is clear, but the facts are less so and this eakens the poem, as it ends up as pure emotion without objective content. Well written, but I think you could improve it by more specifics. vic
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Wow! Now this was an awsome poem and I most definately can relate to it. Good luck in the contest, by the way, PJ is trying to get Kevin to get real certicicates people can print off if they win a contest, it is in the feature box, check it out. Those would be better than fake trophies.
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Yes.
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this is really sad and disturbing. i know of incidents like this and i know of ppl this has happened to.
you did an excelelnt job of emulating the anger, something we all feel about such sictuations.
that it is painful to read.
and its really sad that there are reasons to write such kinds of poetry. that it does leave a person a bit speechless.
very well done.
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VERY TOUCHING
your poem has touched me. I found it to be very sad and yet very well written. Whoever this jerk may be I am glad you told him off. You stood up to him. How he will be able to live with his self, well I just don't know. Thank God for you and many prayers and blessings to the sweet little girl. Thanks for sharing this lovely poem. -
"Just look at her
She's not here anymore
She's dead inside
She screams but no one can hear her"
I really liked that part. the whole thing was a great write. I hope this isn't true. If it is i'm really sorry. if it isn't, then you really seem to understand, and I applaud you for that. great job. -
Profound!
This is a truly awesome write! The rage you incorporated into this piece makes it such a raw, emotional piece! My heart goes out to your friend for the awful things done to her! You have a true gift with words! Debi -
This is so sad and something we never want to admit goes on, and yet we all know it does!
This poem hit me hard and touched my heart! It is a horrible thing to have to experience, and you did a nice job on likening her to a barbie doll or dog, it got the point across!
_write On_
'Licia
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I like the emotion and that you are speaking from experiences that so many have, But it hits me to stark, mostly accusation, not so much feeling, IMHumbleO
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wow, i was almost in tears, the kind of abuse that children suffer is terrible, i don't suppose that those of us that haven't experienced it fully understand.
Well done, a very good read -
This is a heartbreaking write, I can very well relate to it all too, I was 9 at the time it happened to Me, not By My Father's hands but by People We knew, and at 39 years of age it has only come out completely now after all this time, it's something that lives on with You no matter how much You remove it from Your mind, please make sure Your Daughter gets help and guidance as it's helping Me greatly to know People understand what i went through, Embrace Your Daughter tightly, tell Her You love Her, and assure Her all will be ok, as for Her Father I am sorry but He deserves to rot in jail.... Josephine.
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this poem speaks of such a sad reality that some people have had to face. at first i thought this was about the children who's parents force them to live in a cage, very much like an animal, i saw a news thing about that awhile ago, it was terrible.
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This is a terrible experience for anybody to have to go through. I couldn't imagine having to go through something like that being as helpless and impressionable as a little, child. Your verses, showed the anger very, well in the poem. You really go your point across.
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WOW! This truly spoke volumes. It has such emotion, anger, and rage. You can feel the love the WRITER as for the little girl, by the way the writer expresses themselves to the abuser in general. You've done such an amazing job with this.
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Your poem spoke volumes...I can relate, I was abused emotionally and sexually as a child...and it truly F**KS you up for the rest of your life. Good Write!
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i just cringed, shivered and almost got physically ill about what was done to this eight year old child. i so am trying not to cry. i am so sorry. viyanna
the applaus is not for the pain it is for survioving such an atrocity. -
So very tragic this is and my children will never be put in a position to ever have to be exposed to such horrific punishment... I cant go on any farther, my blood boils to hear this. Your write stired lots of emotion in me. God bless. Prince
Edited on Mar 08, 4:44 p.m. because ''. -
thank you for the comment. You always know how to cheer someone up or at least make them feel better. No this is not a personal poem thank god!! I just write this because lately the contest i post is about child abuse and after i read all of it i feel angry. Angry at the society. This is sexually abuse poem and i am physical abuse. Through is not any better and still shame of myself. But i have to thank god for not letting me go through the sexual abuse. One abuse is enough don't need to add another one. My life don't need any drama
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Sad and Brilliant!!!!!
Snow,
This is so gut wrenching. Abuse of any form should not be tolerated and yet it is so prevalent in society that it makes me sick. I pray this was not personal to you. If it was, let me say that you are a survivor and a loving soul. The flowers that adorn your home page with all their meanings show me a heart that is filled with purity and life. The way you spoke out so powerfully here against abuse is to be commended.
It is a brilliant write as sad as it is. I hope that this will be seen by many and the words will stay with all that read it.
Thank you so much for sharing these words and my best wishes for the contest. You deserve gold for this. I will leave you with a standing ovation to go along with my applause. Love and blessings for you my dear friend, today and always.
Joyce
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This is such a sad poem, and sadly this kind of abuse is happening too much. You've written a very heartfelt poem here!
Kiran -
Things like that happen everywhere in the world but only diffenece is do people care??? How much do they care that is the question.
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Snow, this is hurtful, painful, yet I afraid to say a brillent poem. Gosh! I know things like this are done all over the world.
In fact I'm ashamed to say that even now in to-day's time. In my
country INDIA at some states GIRLS ARE TREAT MORE THAN DIRT. [I AM LUCKY TO HAVE THE SUPPORT AND LOVE FROM A LOVELY FAMILY].
I think child abuse is the worst crime in this world. And I really feel that those who do such crimes on innocent souls should be given DEATH! -
Thank you Magic Bullet. For the comment it really hard to get into detail first plaec if you not in this situation. I never been sexually abuse but physcial abuse this is poem for my friend Ling Ling. She suffer so much
Thank you for the comments
dreamer -
Yes. it's reality write but i don't want to get into the detail. This poem is for my friend Ling Ling she chinese too but her mother is working at the uptown so shen and her father stay home. Every day she got sexually abuse by her father and her father 'friend' her father want her to say she like it. So he won't hit her.
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It seems as though there is a lot of anger wrapped up in this poem. Is this a reality write. You didn't actually explained what they were doing to the daughter?
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exelent write
oh my friend so the nightmare lives on.(yet i know that)
but best said in anger than in pity for we will not be downtrodden in adulthood as we were as children ! -
Bravo!
Oh, this is soooo painful, but nicely put together! (I just hope this not a real incident that you are aware of.) Bravo! -
Jez, kind of intense. An abuse piece that's not filled with crappy imagery and self pity (I don't mean that to sound harsh, that people who are abused are not allowed to feel sorry for themselves, I just mean it generally doesn't manifest itself very well in poetry) is a pleasent suprise nonetheless.
I think a third person view point is the best suited mode to discuss this in, and this is an example of why.
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