Can't catch quite what it is, try as I might.
A stone, glossy and hard,
But this odd stone was dealt a strange card.
A curious stone that is an intriguing sight.
A star splayed across its face reflecting the light.
White lines are its unique dressing,
Are they a scar, or are they a blessing?
Do the garish lines mar its face forever?
Or the connection to normal, plain stones do they sever?
As one looks at the stone from different angles the lines shift,
Across the chasms of wonder and mystery they bridge the rift.
I guess it is up to you to decide,
Is this a stone to value, or a stone to hide?
What about me?
When you look at me, what do you see?
I am the same person, who I am will never change,
But do you see a new angle, a new part, a trait with new range?
If you look at me from different angles you will see different views.
Can you quite catch who I am, or will you always find something new?
A shifting star will always show you a brand new side.
Remember that about me, you can always find a new part that tries to hide.
So it is up to you to decide.
Is a shifting star something to value, or something to hide?
Author notes
I wrote this poem for a contest about gem stones, but I wasn't in time to enter it becuase I was sick. I don't know if this is what the contest was looking for, but I thought it was a good peice so I just posted it. Also, the stone I write about is called a Star Saphire. It is just like a normal Saphire, any color, but it has a star that moves accross its serface. The light is refracted back out of the stone causeing a 'star' to appear. Just like in a stone like Tiger Eye where the bands seam to move, the star moves too.
Written March 4th, 2006
A contest entry
- Gems [Contest] by rindomai.
500 points, ended March 10, 2006, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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No
I want to say yes, but this had a lot of forced rhyme in it. You did a good job- I just feel like if this had more consistent meter this would be a lot better.
For what it is, I did like it. It's just not what I am looking for in the contest.
Maybe next season?
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Wow
This is a great poem. So deep and full of emotion. you write so well. I hope to read more of your work.
I haven't heard from you in a while, I hope all is well with you. I miss you. I hope to read more of your work. You are so talented. I hope you will join me at the first of the year after the holidays. I am starting some contest. Some for the group and some for my faviortes. I will send you the link. I hope to hear from you soon. Miss you. God bless you my dear friend. I hope these holidays will be the best and blessed by God.
Tabitha
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great write. I love it. Keep it up.
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i liked it very much. it was unique and well written, keep up the good work!
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Wow! That's good... I'll start with my suggestions would be to split this up into stanzas.... That would help the flow and everything about it... Stanzas help split up the thought... kind of like taking a breathe when giving a speach. Great rhyming... although like Carolyn said, it doesn't have very good rhythm... I think stanzas would help that. I'm not sure if I've heard of that stone... I might have, but I forget.
I forget a lot of things, but ya... great job at writing this
--Tim -
I am not good at rhythm. I admit that. Guilty. I am trying to work on that. This poem just sort of came out. I wonder, I meen, I know how we always say "We are changing. We teenagers, it is what we are supposed to do." But, I wonder if it is not so much change as we find a new part of ourselves we had never seen before. At least that is how I feel a lot. Maybe so people really change and I just discover. (that didn't come out too well. It is not supposed to sound like a negitive thing) I know I have been 'changing' a lot, but I it is more the outside and just a way of looking at things and analyzing, not how I judge them. (that still isn't coming out right). I know it has caused a bit of a rift between us. That is one of the times 'change' is not good. That is both of our faults. A lot of times it seems like you don't have time for me anymore, and you aren't willing to help me out. I don't know, it could be me, you, but most likely both. Either way, I'll always love you. I guess sisters will always have their rough spots, eh?
*~*
Edited on Mar 22, 6:23 p.m. because ''. -
brilliant
interesting. i think this is my most favorite piece out of your work so far! personally, it bothers me that it has no rhythm even though it rhymes. but that is not for me to decide because it is your poem. and that is all that matters. you change every day leanna and that is both good and bad. i've changed a lot myself lately and im realizing that it's not all good. as long as you've a good mind and idea as to where you are going, i think you'll go a long way...you'll be a fricking shooting star then, teeheehee.
hunky-dory work...
~*~carolyn~*~ -
This is a very coool poem. It was a pleasure to read!!
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haha that's awesome! i'm glad to see someone did the star sapphire. i've always thought they were pretty weird... and a good question asked, here! is it worth more or less becuase of these "lines"?
thanks for entering!! hope youre feeling better!
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Thanks a lot! I will be sure to check up on your work, and I really like the idea of doing a collaborative one. People are right, you should make those poems into a story, it would be unique, but very good. You did an overview of a lot of the charictars, and I just did one. Actually, I was able to enter this, the contest was reopend for a day
Good luck to you. God is with you. *~*
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FANTASTIC
What a lovely poem! I decided to come visit your page and read some of your work, especially since you took time to read AND comment on mine-I think your poem would have been a great entry (and a winner) for that contest-but not to worry-other contests are in the making (hint-hint). I just love the descriptions in your poem and the gem has a character (just like mine-but your character is stronger!)Perhaps we could do a collaborative piece about gems-I think you've great talent and encourage you to keep writing. Feel free to visit my page and especially read Looking for G.O.D.-you may find it interesting! peace & blessings
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Yes, I heard about the star sapphire in my earth science class last year...and I think they were selling class rings of the likes this year, but am not sure. I guess the star is to be valued, and wherever the light comes, it will be, but if the light is gone, then so is the star that disappears into hiding. This piece was a great contemporary...and I am glad to have come across it! Keep up the great work and good luck in future writing!
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good job.
i like this cool.
i collect all the stones great work.










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