Dear Saddened Amber Eyes.

Dear Saddened Amber Eyes,
I write to you as a former cutter. I used to cut for all kinds of reasons the main one being, cutting was pain that I could understand. I could feel it, I could see and, and most importantly I could control it. No one made me cut myself, I cut because it helped to distract me from the things going on around me. The pain that I faced as a teenager and being in high school was far too much for me to bear. I was one of those girls that people picked on and teased. I have had some awful things done to me and I never understood why. I always thought that I was a good person, until the pain of being treated this way got too much that I not only turned to cutting, I became something that I never thought I was. I became what everyone said I was. I couldn't handle that thought, and so that is when the cutting became such a big thing for me. I thought that because I did not understand what was going on in my mind and my heart, I could at least understand what was going on with my wrists. There came some times that the doctor told me that if I would have been just a few centimeters over, I would not be here right now.
There are so many reasons that people cut themselves, but there are even more reasons for them to stop cutting themselves. Think of your future, think of all the things that your are meant to do and accomplish in your life. I know that pain can sometimes seem so overwhelming, but alto of times the pain is just in the moment and with time, hearts can heal. There have been many instances that I thought my life was over, and that I simply could not go on. But things get better. As you get older things seem to work themselves out. I am not trying to say that all pain is forgotten, because it most definitely is not, and alto of things you will never get over. But you learn to deal with things. The thing is, is that there are so many things that you are meant to do in your life. So many people that you are destined to meet and enjoy. Every time you cut, even though you may not think of it this way now, you loose a little piece of yourself. In the end, it makes you who you are, but that does not change the fact that there is a certain part of you and your soul that can never be replaced. The best reason in the world for you to stop cutting is because you are who you are because of all the pain and stresses that you go through. You are who you are because of all the things that you go through and all the things that you overcome. Let yourself live and let yourself find a way to deal with the pain without causing more. And hopefully without causing something that you can NEVER change. From the bottom of my heart I wish you the best, and I want you to know.....it really does get better. People and life change.