Now what to do,
i have thought this through,
i was lost no I'm found since you been around.
I see the sun breaking through the clouds,
and a vison of you standing out in a crowd.
Now here comes the rain,
i project my pain,
trying to make sense of theses crazy things.
Sitting in the dark think of the past that i miss,
in the darkness it forces to adapt to this,
if i could have changed my past, i would have one kiss.
No its over, i pored out my heart,
for her to see,
this isn't fair, this cannot be,
another love lost, my heart turned to frost.
Author notes
Written February 25th, 2006
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Comments
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life's never fair. good write.x.
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thanks for the comment and i will change it around thanks.
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this is beautiful work Luke- some really striking, but simply communicated imagery. You might want to look at the last stanza but one again- i can see what you're trying to say and i think theres some great ideas there but it could do with a bit of tidying/restructuring (it might only need a few extra commas) to make it easier to make sense of, and i think that'll also help that part of the poem to flow better.
I love how honest you can be with your work- love this poem
E~
Edited on Feb 26, 2:58 p.m. because 'a one fingered monkey could type better than me'.
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