The wind blows hard,
And the whole world goes inside,
They look out their windows,
And see the gray sky.
Why would they stay,
Where they could get hurt?
People are different,
People don't realize their worth.
Author notes
Written February 18th, 2006
A contest entry
- Anything3....400 points by Epsilina.
400 points, ended February 21, 2006, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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i think that this peom was very good. It really had much better flow than one of your others pieces I read. I think that you really captured how many people think about themselves. I liked how you went about it too. I think that you did a very good job, and there are very few things that I would think could make it better. I think that the first line is the only part that doesn't really make enough sense. It doesn't really go with the rest of the poem, except maybe with the gray skies part. If you just tweaked that line a little bit I think you'd have a really good poem going here. Great job either than that, and write more!!
Exs -
Pretty good, could have used a little tweaking the first part, to make it sound a little better, but good overall.
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Excellent
So true to resent events that people just do not care about their own self worth and feel that nothing can happen to them. Yet it is not them that has to pick up the pieces in the aftermath. Excellent write well said good luck in the contest Brian
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