Dreaming, hoping, wishing, pleading
For one thing that would never reach me
I wanted to sing and dance and twirl
And know that I was good - No
Good is not enough
I cannot simply be "better than some"
I need to be "better than most"
Or, better, "best"
Does it make me a horrible person
To want to be the best?
Does it make me a horrible person
To think that maybe I'm close?
Held down, pushed down, handcuffed to the floor
Time after time I was rejected
Or put in tiny roles
What was there to make me believe
I could ever succeed?
My voice teacher here says
"Its so wonderful to have a student
With a voice like yours
And no idea of her talent."
What she doesn't realize is that
I don't know.
And the second I start to think I might
I have to hold myself down
Push myself down
Handcuff myself to the floor
Because I am terrified to admit to myself
That I might actually be good,
And I might actually make it.
I'm ridiculous and insane, I know
But what do you do,
When the one thing you have longed for
Is suddenly a possibility?
Author notes
Pretty obvious. I know it isn't a great poem. I just needed to express some stuff.
Written February 15th, 2006
In a list
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Comments
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i think you're amazing too.
* hug * I love Laura!
"But what do you do,
When the one thing you have longed for
Is suddenly a possibility?"
Honestly, I don't know. I do know what you DON'T do though - you don't alienate yourself, or tell yourself that it isn't good, or you don't deserve it, or set expectations too high. Just enjoy the moment, and the possibility, but even more, enjoy the journey even if you never do arrive at your planned destination. -
good, i really like this peice. keep writing.
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