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Villanelle -

Why did you come before the morning stars
Had set, and lie down quietly at my side?
The early sun flashed jangling scimitars

Of light, cold morning trickled down the scaurs,
And dreams ebbed out in a relentless tide...
Why did you come before the morning stars?

I could forget, I dreamed, the wild guitars,
The long nights' dancing, till, in golden pride
The early sun flashed jangling scimitars.

The coloured days and nights were triumph-cars
Of glory - till the day all glory died...
Why did you come before the morning stars

Into my dreams, where still a last flame chars
The heart? Caught in your living fire, I sighed...
The early sun flashed jangling scimitars

Of light... and you were gone!... And all the scars
Of half-remembered love sang shrill, and cried:
"Why did you come?" Before the morning stars
The early sun flashed jangling scimitars...

Author notes



NB Some Allpoetry members have had difficulty with the word "scaurs". They are high steep bare slopes on hills or mountains, especially in Yorkshire.

A contest entry

What did you think

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    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
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    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 7 of 7
  • piccola silver member
    November 27, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I don't know exactly why, but I think the word scaurs reminds me of scars. The jagged bare rock appears as scars upon a mountain ... I loved the write. You certainly did the form justice. Thank you for entering and ty for the author notes

  • FaithfulDreamer
    May 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Very nice. Thank you for entering and good luck!

  • the chase
    March 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Anyone who can sucessfully write a villanelle deserves an applause.. This was amazing, it sounds to me like a song that should be accompanied by a guitar somewhere in a quaint little town in Louisiana. ^.^ And I dig that, yo.


  • grannyeri gold member
    February 15, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Congratulations on winning gold with this form of poetry in this contest. Enjoyed taking part in it as well. New forms to try out.


  • ColinSJones
    February 15, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    congrats ..well deserved for such a difficult form


  • chills gold member
    February 13, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Hooray - for once in my AP life it worked. Bloody miracle..! Juxtaposition of scaurs and scars was what I 'enjoyed' in this reading. I'm a bit daft and need to read things more than once.
    Edited on Feb 13, 3:44 p.m. because ''.

  • chills gold member
    February 13, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Oh good - I can applaud this again I hope (don't really know the allpoetry rules because I don't care that much!!) Here goes - more appause - if it doesn't work, please take it as read....! x chilli

1 - 7 of 7