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I feel you

You're the voice inside my head
an empty space
an endless chase
my legs bulit from lead.

I cannot run, I cannot fly
I wished on a star
and there you are
months ago I'd said goodbye.

I gave up long ago
I could take this no more
so I began to ignore
but I saw you again and-oh, no...

see this heart taken from me?
surprise, surprise
behind blue eyes
these tears are temporary.

These lies will never be true
so numb
I've become
but still I feel you.

Author notes

no insporation but whatever..
Written February 9th, 2006

A contest entry

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    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6
  • jennifer18
    April 6, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    GOOD

    Good job!


  • March 22, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is pretty powerful work here. I have been numb before but still felt someone or rather the knife they drove through my heart.

    This really is good work.

    I am sorry it took me forever to get back and return a favor. I am not online much.

    Lady


  • mind of a dreamer
    February 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I like this poem it was good I liked the ending good luck


  • Yunalonei
    February 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I liked this, it was simple and catchy, i enjoyed the rhyming sceme ALOT it wasn't forced and it was a change from what is usually posted.
    Awesome Piece
    Merry Part and Blessed Be
    XxX


  • thepoisonpen
    February 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    cute comment..thanks!!!
    anna

  • -Lost Words-
    February 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    this is cool

    I love that ' surprise, surprise, behind blue eyes'

    Sounds like ' come out, come out, wherever you are'

1 - 6 of 6