Forever the Fool
To most eyes I shall always be
That is all people know of me
The fool
That is all anyone has ever known of me
They see my mind and body
They see the fool, in public.
What I wish them to see
To speak nothing witty just to see
What they think of me.
Alone
I act the quiet and complacent, free from emotion
To think and observe all those around me
There I see what they think of me
In private, I am different
Witty, and free from thought
My mind calculates and speaks what it thought
To all that will hear and enjoy
All that I carefree to divulge
For my mind, is the most active of me,
Observing and thinking and ruling me
but my soul they shall never see
no one but me.
For my soul is for me
I am different there then ever I can be
My soul shows just what is me,
over ruling the mind and body.
My mind screams and tries to contend
Wishing to rule over all that I am.
They will never know me,
not even my mind and body
They are only what I wish them to be
Most will only ever know the Fool they see
Forever i will be the Fool, as my mind wishes to be.
Nobody will ever know the one that is Me
Author notes
Written February 8th, 2006
A contest entry
- I need an AP Family by Nightwish girl.
300 points, ended March 13, 2006, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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You did great job on this
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but my soul they shall never see
no one but me.
Those need to be capitalized.
not even my mind and body
That needs to be capitalized as well.
Forever i will be the Fool, as my mind wishes to be.
That needs to be I, not i. Also, correct that in the brief box.
Nobody will ever know the one that is Me
That really ought to be me, not Me.
Sorry, I am the spelling and grammar Nazi. Other than that, it was good, but proper spelling and grammar will make the piece more presentable.
Auf Wiedersehen,
Bailey -
Thankyou for all oyur comments, i appreciate them all very much.
For those of you that have recomended changes i have changed as much as i have noticed, the starnge writing was originally a ' it seeemed to not come out corrctly after the post.
Thankyou all and i will continue to write as best i can. -
A nice insight into your inner self. I read poetry such as this and wonder if this is a vehicle for you to expose yourself - as easy as it would be in an annonymous site to a crowd of strangers. Perhaps the "Fool" that you wish to portray is seeking a little quiet time out of the limelight?
This was a well written, expressive poem.
"but my soul they shall never see
no one but me." I think these words hit me the hardest as they are so completely true. This is the one thing that we can protect from the outside world and keep to ourselves. When everything is gone this is something we can NEVER lose.
Kudos and keep writing.
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This is a really interesting poem and I enjoyed reading it.. It was kind of confusing but I got it in the end .. I really like your poetry.. Great write
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Great poem My only critiques are the spelling of 'no' on the last line- pretty sure it should be 'know' and 'all that I carefree to divulge'- what does this mean? I didn't understand.
This was a good poem about people's perceptions of you and how it differs from reality. They don't see the great person you are (if I understood correctly) since you choose to stand apart and not become one of the 'stars'. This contrasts with the real you. It's as though you have a hidden self. The part about the soul ruling the mind and body reminded me a little bit of Plato's theory of the charrioteer. Keep writing, this was a very wise piece and I'm glad to see that you've got more poetry up- I was worried you wouldn't get another great one written
Thanks for your critique I'm not sure exactly how it was on a cliff hanger, do you have any suggestions as to how I should end it? (I'd be grateful for them .) (no offence, but I don't really like my name so please don't use it on AP )
All the best
Pozo
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10 out of 10
Hey I this is a really good poem. Nice write -
Excellent
Complicated but I am too so I can completely understand where it is you come from. people have no clue to whom it is they really see, actions and image is not all there is about a person. No one ever seems to want to get to the bottom of the person they can see, they choose instead to form opinions which are more then likely like the ones people have of me! UNINFORMED opinions. The things I have done infront of people and how I acted had everything to do with what I lived with behind closed doors! Something people never saw because my ex was all about how he appeared to people and not about who he was or what was going on with himself! Keep being you and never let anyone sway the way you are. If they don't like it they can leave! they are the ones who are not worth your time
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