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Everlasting Black

I have wondered of the Everlasting Black
I have thought of what must be so
I have faced it and seen it will not go


I have seen all become it and worship it
I have seen them spread it with love
I have seen it consume and feast
I have seen others follow it
I have watched it grow

I have faced hardships both cruel and long
I have been beat and bruised
I have faced the night that lasts
I have seen the winding road and walked alone

I have been tempted and i have resisted
I have seen the shade creep towards me

I have resisted
I have fought
I have bathed in contemplation at the thought of black
I have tried the darkness that is too fall
I have hated the Blackness within the human soul

I have seen the blackness of the human heart
I have wondered how it came
I have wondered what makes it so dark
I know it will spread
I know it will consume
I will fight it where i find it

And I have seen the everlasting black.

Author notes

I would love comments for my first ever poem

I refer to the 'black' as the darkness in the human spirit. I have been bullied by people and have watched bullying all my life. I watched how dark and corrupt people can get even freinds that i have grown up with since i was young have turned and have done things to other human beings i do not believe to be moral. This poem is of my own dances with corruption and sin. And i thank all of you for your views and am touched that it has individual meaning for everyone.
Written February 7th, 2006

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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Darkness Falls
    February 27, 2006
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    Frackin' beautiful. Worth every reward point.
    I'm curious if you're going to write more stuff with darkness personified...


  • Tarja
    February 8, 2006
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    Your first poem ever is amazing! lol. My first poem was a haiku about lunch... of course I was like 7! This is wonderful. I love the depth of it and the darkness! (hey! ) Anyways this is great. Good job.
    amanda


  • MarkMyWords
    February 7, 2006
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    I think this poem is pretty nice, but it's confused me some. It seems like your poem skipped around a bit. And I'm also confused of your definition of Everlasting Black. Is it sadness? Emptiness? Or is it merely night, or just infinite being or space?

    I have tried the shade
    I have hated the shade

    With these two lines, they seem a bit short. Rushed. I can tell from the rest of your poem that you have the ability to really dig and pull in meaning and symbolism, so do it here. Develop these lines. Bring in some new vocabulary, and maybe knock out one of those "shade" words. Thesauri really help with figuring out the perfect way to express yourself.

    I think this poem was really great, especially for your first poem. Welcome to the site, and since The Butterfly wanted to applaud but couldn't, I think I can help them out. Great job.


  • xDemonicxAngelx
    February 7, 2006
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    Brilliant x 10

    Wow... This is your first ever poem?!?!?.. WOW, you've got alot of talent there.. This poem amazes me.. The use of words paints a picture in my mind.. This is a totally kick ass write for your first poem!!!!.. I am really looking forward to reading some more of your work.. Great write I would applaud it but I have no applauds left


  • San-d
    February 7, 2006
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    Iam getting that "black" is referring to the evil that is in the world today. Tried it, hated it, resisted it, and even been abused by evil and then walked down the path..alone and unsure of what was to come...This is deep and I have asked and wondered about what this pen emplies myself many times.......This is a great write and I applaud you.
    Smiles Your way >>>>>>Sandy San-d
    Edited on Feb 07, 3:45 p.m. because ''.


  • CinderellaTears
    February 7, 2006
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    i am in awe by this...its profoundly beautiful, dark, painful, and hopeful, all within these lines of this one poem. a person can few so many emotions with this; it's amazing. i almost feel as if it could be made into a song, it just would make fantastic lyrics
    im surprised that this is the first poem you ever wrote...that would make you quite a talented writer, shows you have a natural talent. if this is a first, then you MUST continue writing even more great poems, etc. you are an amazing poet!!!
    this almost seems as if it could be based on society as well...simply because im interpreting "the everlasting black" as something to do with societal issues, like...how the world is full of so much temptation, and how you've seen it consume people, how they have given into the sin. you obviously have given in to it, too, i am sure; however, you have tried your best to avert the eyes of sin and turn away from it.
    it says that you have been beaten and bruised, which i take as one of two things: either it is a physical abuse you have endured/still are going through, OR it is concerning mental abuse. then again it could be a combination of both. or i could be completely off!! i don't know, you could clarify that for me.
    i am just completely and utterly astounded by this poem. you have a beautiful way with words, and i hope to see more of your work.
    peace
    cassandra


  • Kevo MF Last
    February 7, 2006
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    dude....seriously.....this is your first poem? no way. what were you doing before you started writing poetry. If it wasnt something english oreiented than DAMN, you have talent, either way an amazing write. Im curious as to what the black is. I think i almost felt black equals sin perhaps? idk. Ifs thats not what your grtting at then thats really weird on its own part, if I found christianity in a poem that it wasnt suppost to be in...that would make me think...


  • February 7, 2006
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    wow..this poem is great..well done keep up the good work
    Kirsty


  • Scotlass
    February 7, 2006
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    If this is your first ever poem then I must ask... "What have you been doing until now?". Well done and I truly look forward to reading more. I understand from a prior comment that your previous work in old-fashioned.. This is so contemporary that I would be interested in seeing your versatility. Well Done and keep writing.

  • pozo
    February 7, 2006
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    You said I had talent, well I know I started younger but when I started I wrote far worse than this. This was a poem most poets would be proud of It does seem a little like Invictus but it's not too much, it has its own distinctive flavour. Is this personal? It certainly does remind me of bullying, a very sad write. You used imagery and alliteration, especially the extended metaphor of 'black' for evil well here. A very powerful poem. Quite sad and dark. Keep writing, I liked the modern tone here too, the thing about most of your work is it's quite old fashioned- this had a modern, almost timeless, tone to it Great first write
    All the best
    Your friend
    Pozo

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