Rain streams down my window
Like tears down a child's face
A child who was abandoned
Whose life is but a disgrace
The thunder rages as it will
As will many when is revealed
The names of two who switched around
In hope that one who's lost is found
The lightning flashes off and on
Like that of the girl's smile
As quickly as it comes, it goes
For all on Earth in vile.
Author notes
Most everyone who's read this poem liked it (save for those who saw it with it's terrible background), but somehow, I don't think anyone will ever get what this poem is truly about.
Written February 5th, 2006
by Erin
OPTION 7 (for 7 options contest)
OPTION 3 (for everythin angst)
This poem will feature in the local coffee house!!
A contest entry
- 8 options of madness by McFairy.
2000 points, ended June 2, 2007, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Everythin angst by BarbedWireButterfly.
600 points, ended March 28, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 13 of 13
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Hm, I didn't get it. So, I guess that makes this an intriguing write. I am not the one who needs to anyway.....best of luck!!!!
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If the one who's lost is not you, perhaps the one lost should not be found, sometimes it's much better that way. Thanks for entering my contest, this is very capturing.
***Strangeangel*** -
i'm so sorry about the mix up. thank you for re entering and putting the right option.
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option 4???
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My bad. Option 7.
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very interesting. you could have also chosen option 3 but I can see how option 4 applies here. well done for mixing the options and not knowing it. lol, it's very well structured and filled with emotion. thanku for entering and good luck
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Sorry I never replied to that message, I've made a habit of kinda skimming messages and didn't realize I was supposed to respond!
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is like suppose to be life? and i agree with the rest you need to change something here. it is really hard to read this piece.
Toodles
Megan -
Oh and one more thing. If you're interested to know how many points you've received, just send me a message and I'll be more than happy to give them to you :-)
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Alright, well let me just tell you that I hate the background. It's really difficult to read your poem. I shouldn't have to highlight what you've written to read it. Anyway, the poem was interesting. I'm unsure about some of the lines. Especially this one:
"Who's like is a disgrace"
Who's like? What does that mean? I think this piece could use some work. Although it's a good start. -
that's a really bad background. I can't even read the poem. And it's kinda mesmerising...
Flash..
Flash...
Flash
(Now look what you've done!!!)
Love
Marianne -
I love storms. :-) The poem is nice, but the background (really cool) is too distracting for reading it very well.
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I like this, though their are a few grammar/spelling mistakes. Also, i like the background, but with the lightness of the font the poem's hard to read.
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