WEll im glad that you feel like your so fucking great
With your slaughter of loved ones
thank god I cant relate
Its adorable how you seem to think your above us
havent you noticed
you cant keep a friends trust?
And life is broadway
filled with drama and lies
hows it feel to be the author
of sellouts each night?
in Your "gone with the wind"
I am scarlet O'hara
AS i look in your eyes
my own fill with sorrow
I wish you could relise
your wasteland of a tomorrow
for what have you
when you betray all of your friends
my dear this is how hate
and world war begins
its the people like you
who drive knives into backs
and when thier victims turn around
they kiss thier wounds with frail tact
Author notes
yeah my old best friend baisically sucks.
Written February 1st, 2006
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
-
This was about me losing my best friend. ALthough i would normally appreciate input, this is not one of those times where i need somebody else telling me how to make me poetry better. I was angry, and these are my feeling of that moment, and i dont dare change them. I am not a pessimistic person, and i think this poems gives off the misconception that i hate life. It was directed towards one person, and they deserve every malicous word of it.
-
a difficult line to accept why at all you get that thought try to put some positive thoughts,even to consider that you are not inspired anyway you have tried well to unveil the mask of falsyfying ;love:under the veils of false illusions
-
thank you. I like the way you talk, and i sincerly mean that, you are so polite!!! ITs very nice. Thank you for the constructive critisim, i realise this couldve been better.
-
Beautiful...
Darling-
This was wonderful. Some lines seem to weaken the poem's overall strength, but then other lines make the poem stand out. I liked your style and flow in this poem. It seemed to jump around, but somehow I think you made it work. I think you did amazing dear. I hope your situation gets better.
♥-
Rhiannon Angelique -
thank you! and i dont think you know her. I was very angry when i wrote this, so it probobly didnt live up to its full potential. I really miss you and Ashley i never see you anymore!
-
Is this someone I know?
"AS i look in your eyes
my own fill with sorrow
I wish you could relise
your wasteland of a tomorrow"
Very strong lines there. Probably the best in the poem. -
thanks. its not good though. my writing has been sucking lately.
-
I like how you wrote this. it's very deep but then again it's sad. i have had friends betray me too. she/he doesn't deserve friends.
Adding your comment:
1 - 8 of 8
1 old applause
