Let me fall, let me cry,
Let me lay here as I die.
I’ve lost all of my zeal,
Therefore I can no longer feel.
I’m still living, but my soul isn’t alive,
Everyday I fight and strive.
I want, I need, and I long,
To stand upright, tall, and strong.
Help me to live once more,
Can’t you see I’m suffering at the core?
Love me forever and always,
Think of me for the rest of your days.
If you care then you will lend a hand,
Then I’ll help you understand.
We were meant to be,
Together forever, lively, and free.
Author notes
Written December 30th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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we usually are waiting for someone to come and understand us, some do, but are scared and try to run away from it ,some dont, but those have no heart...I know it because I feel like this too...image wise you look ok, but in the interior you are screaming for help, but no one seems to hear it...great write, my kind of poetry
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The sad thing is...
That you know it, but they don't and I'll tell you as almost double your age (not quite) there is no convincing them. None! They have to see it for themselves and you want them to. Then you know they love you for you. I loved this piece its a cry a longing a journey. Keep going my friend keep going...your poetic friend
Still Standing -
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Oh my! This piece is so old and crappy. It's needs major updating. The meter is horrible! Thanks for the comment despite my awful writing.
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I hope you are with this person you've put your soul into and again I hope this person will always love and never leave you. If they do there will be nothing left of you. "lIFE" is such a beauty full of passion, love and thrills. Each of us possess this within ourselves. These are the things we share as we pass throughout each other lives and leave with these memories that neighter will forget. Each time we learn a lesson that we carry on until we find that moment when we finally meet a person who understands, how far we've had to come to just get to this place. Don't give away the one thing no one else can take. You are filled with more wonder and glory than you may ever think.
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This is an awesome, flowing poem. So much meaning is described. I love your style. It is so natural. Thanks for sharing it. God bless, and good luck. PS. I know luck has nothing to do with it for you. You are blessed.
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i just love this hold poem every words from beginning to ean,
it is such a touching piece, good message to share with others,
just a lovely job you have done.
this was a joy to read. -
i liked the first stanza. it was beautiful and pulled me in. but the last stanza wasn't as beautiful. it didn't really rap it up for me. it was like a dead end. or i drifted somewhere in the middle. i reread it like three times. i still can't understand it. i understand the meaing, your desire to be loved. i think you focused to much on rhyming. but it is still beautiful. thanx for sharing.
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This is kinda sad. I hope you don't really feel like this at this exact moment. You need to read some funny stuff fast. Hurry up and read something funny now. Laughing cures.
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nice
truly inspirational, keep up the great work! best wishes
~love-music-darkness
"What I give form to in daylight is only one percent of what I have seen in darkness." - M.C. Escher -
Oh.. how I miss my regular fav reads, and this one is for sure one of your best ones. I miss reading and having all my time free, this is a wonderful piece.. great work!!
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you just wrote the words i am feeling. not being wanted is a terrible feeling. i just now got bad news about my family and so wanted to cry anyway so now i really do. you wrote my heart so very well. i just wish someone would take my hand. viyanna r langager
the applaus is for the writing not for the pain. -
I'm like the wind that blows sofly. Sometimes I shift and drift in different direction. I never worry much for I believe I must accomplish my will according to my destiny. I like this piece so very much. Don't let things get to you for you are one in a million. When you feel that life has nothing storing for you that's when you have everything. Don't be disappointed, he who thinks he's rich has nothing in the world. Thank you for sharing this great piece, you have a bless day and thank you for sharing it as well
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i'm baaaack! (for now
) This was good. Keep it up!
~sumthinlifeish -
This reminds me of a girl I live with. It's a very sad and distressing situation. This poem is lovely. It's clear, the pain and struggles, and the desire to change. Nice
Amanda -
this is great. i swear to god i'm writing a poem almost like this but i just cant get my words to come out right. you ahve such a gift, and i mean i have one too, but i can never make anything work like this. do you think you can give me some tips, i mean i write alright, but not as good as you. your words are just good:
Let me fall, let me cry,
Let me lay here as I die.
I’ve lost all of my zeal,
Therefore I can no longer feel.
THAT FIRST PART GOT ME. BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THE LAST PART:
If you care then you will lend a hand,
Then I’ll help you understand.
We were meant to be,
Together forever, lively, and free.
BRAVO! IT'S REALLY GOOD. I GOTTA GO. KEEP UP THE WRITING.
~Nini~ -
Oh, I am so sorry, I returned here via your Featured add. I had thought this was a new write from you. Anyway, again, great writing!
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This poem reaches off the screen and into our hearts. It's lyrical, musical, sad and yet serene. Wonderful writing and keep up the great work.
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this is a great poem, yet, it is very sad...the emotions here, are so deep...i really enjoyed reading it...i can also relate to it...my favorite stanza
If you care then you will lend a hand,
Then I’ll help you understand.
We were meant to be,
Together forever, lively, and free.
if only there were those who cared, then we could make them understand, however, not always do people understand what we are trying to say...that is the very very sad place our world is today.....
job well done with this peice...
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i'm sorry you feel like this
you seem to have a yearn of desire for love. this also seems such a sad poem. its like you have a craving for love. i tell you one thing: be carful of who and what you wish for in love and what you want out of it. my username lives up to it completly. best of luck with your feelings. dont get hurt like i did. -
It's a great write!
Edited on Jan 27, 9:31 because ''. -
We all get down like this at times, feeling kind of helpless to change things, yet wanting to. Asking a loved one for help is good, hopefully they will come around. Keep writing, Hope you soon feel better.
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I like it ,I can relate to the way you feel in this peice.
Really amazing .I always think sad poems are the best , and this is really beautiful . -
wow
! this is a great poem i hope you feel better soon you seem depressed but youll see every thing will go as you want it or it will go the way it is meant to be.. anyways i really liked your poem keep up the great work -
hey!! this is awesome! i love it its so sad though but in a way i can relate to it nice work!!
-Nat -
Risa, this is great! The first line reminds me of the song Let me Fall by Josh Groban. I know that's what you inspired you to write this. Wonderful write!
Stay out of the lime light,
~Sumthinlifeish
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