And God did call Bob, his humble servant, to the mountain
And God spoke thus 'Bob, stop slouching and chisel this down!'
'Commandment I: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbours sheep'
'Commandment II: Thou shalt not bogart a joint'
'Commandment III: Thou shalt not eat armadillo'
Commandmet IV: Thou shalt not cop a feel of a lapdancer (unless thou payeth extra)'
'Commandment V: Thou shalt not masturbate and wipeth thine issue upon the expensive curtains'
And Bob did chisel away with great enthusiasm
And God spoke a bit more but Bob was a slow writer and missed some.
Author notes
More from Bob
Written January 19th, 2006
What did you think
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1 - 8 of 8
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ahh crap i broke another five comandments awsome write
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God dont mind, he loves everyone right? AND! He knew I would write this anyway, what with him being so bloody omnipotent. So surely if he didnt want me to write it then he would have made me get run over by a bus on wednesday. Anyway, I think he wanted me to write it so that SOME Christians might not take themselves so seriously, especially the ones that hate blacks, gays, people of other religions and anyone else who doesnt do exactly the same as them..... Being a Christian is supposed to be about loving your fellow man/woman. Why not try it instead of getting the message wrong. Rant over. And Tai Felina, big hugs.
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Oh, and Satan feels very discriminated by you. He says you should not poke fun at his dominion. He's crying now.
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For crying out loud, Dreamon, I'm sure God has a sense of humour. He's probably laughing at these gospels, and at you. Just lighten up! It's in some people's nature to laugh at things - after all, it's better to make a joke about the Bible than to become upset by it, right? God wants us to be happy, and jokes make us happy. This is a joke. God likes it. So if you speak for God, why not laugh with him? Oh, and deliverance23, this is fantastic.
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Heh that was cute. I thought it was great, but watch out for those religious types that can't take a joke. If they bother you, just ignore them. I'm a christian, but I think i can handle it. So long as it's funny. It made me giggle a little, and now i'm going to read part 1 and 2
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I only laugh at you and your blindness. My child already does those things, but as father, I love her anyway.
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Jeez, lighten up XD I though it was great, but maybe if you could poet-ize it, it'd be better. geat isea!
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guilty
You're sick and if you wanna poke and laugh at Satan's dominion, then that's fine but watch out when you go picking on the Big Boss. You will have to answer for making fun of His Commandments! One day, your child will laugh, mock and ignore you and will it still be funny THEN?
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