after a storm
waves become the stage-
the moon dances
Author notes
Written January 18th, 2006
In a list
A contest entry
- Your best Haiku / Senryu by J Rhys Davies.
300 points, ended January 20, 2006, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 40 of 40
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Another haiku another gold. I'm tempted to host a haiku contest about the moon just to get you inspired...but you'd probably hang me from the edge of the moon, lol
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dancing moon is beautiful!!
wow!! this is spectacular!!! Congrats on your gold trophy!! -Slick -
Storms (we've had floods and tornados here) not only frighten us and create havoc, but force us to remember that after the storms, indeed, he moon does dance. Thanks.
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this is gorgeous - congrats!
what beautiful imagery...
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excellent~
Fantastic haiku's
I am slowly after years finally getting the hang of the syllable count...remember how I used to ask you if the count was correct?? Roflol
This is beautiful and congrats on the gold...
I can see why it won
Hugs
Susan~~~
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Thanks Susan
There is not much to count, I rarely use that 5-7-5 syllable format thing.
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So simple, beautiful and complete!!!
(And difficult to make one..!)
Love
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ripples of light spill the ocean's power across the world's horizons - night kisses day as the heavens spin a good piece.
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Bonita
Mari , this is awesome but then you already klnow that I can picture the waves after a storm and the performing artist the moon dancing on them -lovely picture
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this is 'new'? you posted it on january 18th. :-/
well you know me, i'd probably approach this a little differently:
in the distance clouds
depart from a wimpling stage
where moon lightly dances
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LOL you were at the wrong haiku
Was wondering what clouds had to do with a moth when I got the message about your comment.
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Short, but it holds a lot. I picture a moon just moving across water on a peacefull night. Great poem.
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Love this haiku. I really enjoyed the idea of the waves becoming the stage. It reminded me of the early operas and their attempts to capture nature. A feat you have done in three little lines.
BRAVO
John
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It is a beautiful morning here, and I've just reached office. The great picture in your haiku is wonderful, relaxing, and almost meditative. I am reading this again, but beauty has only grown!
Hope you're doing well, Mari!
~Sau
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plucked from high in sky
she embraced it here on earth
grounded...like herself
Happy Thursday...Eddy
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Enchanting, Wondrous
I Love, Love this, oh Mari, you write amazing Haiku and this one is so special, think I will bookmark this, so simple, yet the Imagery is just so full and this is one amazing poem, you are so, so good at these and I Love the Moon as it dances after that storm!
Brava, BellaBellaMari
yes, this is a keeper, Thank YOU!
mi mi
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I know you are proud of your haiku, etc. So I'm proud of them too. I just wanted to come have another look.
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I must say, you’ve achieved epitome in writing Haikus… only you can imagine such a personification associated with moon … these three lines have drawn a beautiful imagery in my mind… absolutely adorable…
Congratulations on winning Gold… you deserved it by far…
mina
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I am a fan of the moon. I love it in all it's phases. Your haiku makes it all the more grand. I can see it dancing. Great!
Always ♥
Renee
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Gold
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Aaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnndddddddddddddd I shall bookmark this one because I do so like it. The imagery the simple lines invoke are stunning and I cannot even find the words to tell you how much I like it.
Elisa
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my moon also danced
Last night a full moon here in this land. Walking in the forest without a flashlight leaves beneath my feet crisply crunching. A bright clear cold night, and through the canopy of bare branches, my moon also danced. This is a lovely haiku in the purest form, well done and said.
SirPort
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Wow-
You are soooo good at these Mari
Any topic~ Any form from what I have seen~ You can
pen with ease~
Love this Haiku~
Keep that ink flowing~~
and Your Creative Mind going
Many blessings to You this New Year!
Best wishes too
Congratulations on Your Gold Trophy too
and much love~ Desire~*~
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You and that moon! Hey, this won the gold trophy? Cool! I must have known that but cool none-the-less. Someday, you can recite haiku to me while we watch the scene unfold.
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Thanks Charishma!
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Congrats! Very well deserved GOLD win!
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Thanks Patti!
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Thank you Belle, I very much appreciate the thumbs up
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Hats off to you, Madam.. you swept us off our feet with this one.. very deserving of the gold it was! Congrats!! Bravo!
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This was great. I can see why you got the gold. Wonderfully done. Patti
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Sunrising: I loved your Haiku. Very beautifully done!
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Thanks John, I'm happy you could see a nice imagery here
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Thanks Charisma, glad you liked it
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Your haiku is certainly worth a gold trophy
Did you post it?
here is one specially for you
with skimmed milk
cowz fill Yem's cereal bowl
after the rain
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This was awesome! I loved the image of the setting moon in the horizon of the ocean that was created in my mind with this. Simply brilliant!
~ John
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before the storm
the cowz lay down-
yem eats his cereal dry
Isn't that a sad Haiku? Think I should enter it?
Why are you out at night to see such events? Stay in the house when it rains...didn't your mom ever tell you that? Now you make me want to go out and see for myself, but it is far too cloudy tonight, no way I'd see those waves across the moon.
Very creative! Who'd a thunk to see the moon and the moving clouds in such a manner? Well, you obviously.
So? My haiku...think it would win the gold?
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before the storm
the cowz lay down-
yem eats his cereal dry
Now that is great.
John -
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LOL, Great and sad...no milk...it's almost as bad as no Moxie!
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Very striking imagery in this haiku. I like the idea of the moon dancing. Nicely penned with a good 'Aha moment'.
Goodluck always,
Charishma
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