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A Broken Truth

A Broken Truth

Frozen in time
A mere memory
Loneliness written all over the place.
A frozen heart
Expanded
Keeping everyone at bay with one icy stare.
A broken heart
Forgotten
Freezing her tears before they fall.
A trust betrayed
Never to be forgiven.
A love turned sour
Never to return.
Frozen in a miserable stance
Forever

Author notes

I choose picture two because she looked so sad and dejected
Written January 13th, 2006

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 13 of 13
  • Kenshins wife
    October 12, 2006
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    this is a good write. this is something everyone can relate to. the emotions are very clear and very heart grabing. it hit home for me. great job.


  • Poetic Tasha Moderators member
    September 19, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Frozen in a miserable stance
    Forever

    sometimes i truly feel this way that you wrote in the last 2 lines....
    This is a wonderful write...i truly enjoyed it
    Also thanks for commenting on my work
    Tasha


  • Cherrylv
    April 29, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful

    Firts of all Thanks for your comments about my poem. Giggles you MUST go and buy a bunny LOL I can highly recommend him. Giggles

    Secondly, this poem is beautiful, the feelings you describe I totally identify with and I still cannot forgive the man that broke my heart. Trust now is so difficult to give.

    I hope the poem is not a reflection of your own experiences, I hope yours are much happier than mine

  • katsoccerqueen
    April 23, 2006
    Edit | Reply

    very good

    aww! wow thats a REALLY good write! i love the format to. wow. um... i don't think theres anything i don't like about it. i love the descriptions andhow she feels becuase i have had my heart broken and you really do just feel numb. good write and keep it up!
    Kat
    P.S. thanks for reading mine!


  • neVerAgain
    April 20, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Wow this is really pretty and flows really well... Really sad too ~Lynsay~


  • Something Real
    April 20, 2006
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    Awww this was so pretty.
    Loved the imagary.
    Keep writing! =D ♥


  • daisybee
    April 20, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    this was really sad-and almost written with a cold tone which adds to its sentiment-good write!


  • PrInCeSsOfRoCk gold member
    April 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    this was really good with some great imagery. i realy enjoyed reading this and im not just saying that keep up the good work and thanx for your comment on "youre my reason".

    Chris


  • ohsweetie970
    April 17, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    thank you for the kind words!

    ash

  • A ToXiC ThOrN
    April 17, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I really enjoyed this write. I like the message it sends and everything flowed great. Great job, thank you for your thoughts, and keep up the good work.
    ~Crimson


  • ShadesXofXGray
    January 23, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful job! I love the flow of things and I think everyone knows how it feels to be frozen inside and out, and though the feeling of being so cold only lasts for a little while it can feel like forever and after that the fire inside only needs a bit more time to re-grow.
    lovely job!
    Love,
    Kid


  • LifeEndsNow
    January 15, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This was great i really liked it great flow and everything awsome job keep it up and good luck -Kevin


  • Gwenevere
    January 14, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Frozen in time,how many feel this when they lose someone precious.All feeling s numb.Good write, good luck, Ros

1 - 13 of 13