My life is a true reflection by the condition of my shoes,
they can be down trodden or dull, like a dose of the blues.
A clean with a brush and polished with much tender care,
is like singing in the shower rubbing shampoo in my hair.
They mirror my feelings, with toe caps shining and bright
while I feel invincible ready to tackle all tasks in sight.
My shoes carry me everywhere and through thin and thick
but only get to rest at those occasions when I get sick.
They heave a sigh of relief, as I take them off at night,
a time to recover and prepare for tomorrow’s onward fight.
The reflection is dimmed, by the dust which gathers there,
but can easily be wiped clean with tender soft loving care.
The dust upon my shoes reflects today’s activities so true,
whether they are aged or tattered and even when brand new.
The colour of the dust, is proof of the places I have been,
reminding me visibly again, of those things that were seen.
For the dust gives an account, with subtle clues one by one,
a vivid movie showing my day and things that I have done.
So it’s with pleasure I polish them each and every night,
as I smile recalling my day, with my amused mental sight.
Sometimes they are wet, damp or soiled heavily as well,
or from the day’s location, picked up a foul or evil smell.
With tender care they are dried and polished shiny bright,
I thank the Lord above, for my fascinating quaint insight.
Dust on one’s shoes reflects the personality there within,
be it interesting, dull, or gloomy, as memories then begin.
They confirm the extent, of each person's personal pride,
if the owner has laziness, peace or turmoil locked inside.
Shoes can be simple or with embellishments rich and lavish,
Indicating that person’s temperament or an individual fetish.
My shoes reflect happiness and will sometimes show sorrow;
I weaken at times proposing to clean and polish them tomorrow,
but I know that a loving polish will educate me of the past
and prepare for the future with recollections that will last.
Dust on my shoes has been a mirror for many of my past years
treading the path of destiny with fondest memories and tears.
.
Author notes
Written January 10th, 2006
Option 2
In a list
A contest entry
- Inanimate Objects Come to Life by tanzanite.
900 points, ended March 24, 2008, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Of pencils and of other things.... the contest of inanimate objects. :) Clicky clicky! by squirrelgirl.
800 points, ended April 20, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Be Prompt by Darkwell.
1050 points, ended August 20, 2008, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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This is such a great write! I love the way you blend your life and the condition of your shoes to talk about different state of thinking and emotions and travels.
My shoes reflect happiness and will sometimes show sorrow;
I weaken at times proposing to clean and polish them tomorrow,
its so like procrastinating here which everybody does and i really like your descriptions
Sometimes they are wet, damp or soiled heavily as well,
or from the day’s location, picked up a foul or evil smell.
that made me LOL
WTG! Good luck in the contest -
Three times is not a "lot" especially when tender care was mentioned only twice. I thank you for pointing it out but I believe you are on the verge of nit picking.
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Tender loving care, eh? That's in this poem a lot.
What interesting thoughts about shoes.
Thank you for your contribution!
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I loved this piece because of its link to more than just the polish, the care and the things they remind you of. My father always used to say that the state of a man's shoes says a lot about them. I think you did a magnificent job. Two things though - I understand that this is free verse, but I think it needs a little more punctuation. I also don't like caps at the beginning of each line. If you feel this adds to your piece and does not detract from it, please feel free to not change this. Other than those two things, I am really happy with this entry.
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Almost fixed
Seeing as you went to so much trouble ,explaining I did a quick rewrite on my entry. -
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I can see that you did a lot with this piece now. I love the changes so far. Thank you for not taking my comment personally . Some people do. I think it has added a lot to this piece. Thanks for your extra effort. I really love this piece.
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Thank you too.
Thank you for the gold and it was such a wonderful way to start the day and I want to congratulate you of running such a fair and clean contest and also to congratualte the other prize winners and contestants. A big success all around.
Bazza
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A few things to correct.
Yes, I agree with you, but we all had to start somewhere and learning takes time, as it was one of my very early poems. I have not updated it and fixed that error of starting each line with a cap, but will do so on the original in the near future. Thanks for your comments and taking the time. Do you have any association with the mining or supply of Tanzanite ? I am a hobby jeweller and it is one of my favourite gemstones but also a bit expensive unless one knows a good source of supply.
Bazza -
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I do not have any association with mining or the supply of Tanzanite. I love the stone and I love the fact that they are rare and precious. That is why I chose this handle I think. I am a rough and unpolished gem too on my way and growing. I write a lot of erotica and also spiritual pieces. If you are not into erotica and want to read some of my stuff, there are some things to read. You just have to sift through them really well. Hope you find something that you could help me improve as well.
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That's pretty cool how you've come up with this man. It all makes so much sence ahaha I must be in a bad part of my life right now because my shoes are a really bad condition. Well, anyways, great work, and good luck in the contest man.
-Angel- -
a good sedate pace to your poem here - taking the reader calmly through your thoughts - the only thing i would suggest is where you have within at the end of two lines in succession, change one of them? spill poetic ink and twist me, turn me into the wild lemony crazy shape of unfathomable love...
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exceptional
What a marvelous metaphorical poem, Bazza. You've done exactly what the contest called for, as I'll never see my shoes in quite the same light again. Congratulations on winning the gold trophy, you certainy derserve it.
All the best,
Mercury Rising -
stoneage Thank youy Blayde for the commenst and I thought it may be a good one for your competitions because of the awareness you are showing in them. This was of course rhyming free verse again.
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You have opened a door for me. My shoes are important to me and about me, perhaps I have taken them for granted and perhaps not shown the proper respect for my shoes or myself. Very insightful poem. Thank you for entering the contest
Blayde -
This one, I like. I would leave out the "A" in the 3rd line to let it read a bit clearer. I love works about ordinary every day items we so often overlook. I have one about my basement stairs. This is what it reminded me of. introspection from dust. from dust to dust.
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AMAZING POEM
My My what a delightful poem you have penned here. Your amazing words weave an wonderful story. I smiled reading the whole poem. Your poems have cheered me tonight. I love these lines. They are so true.
They heave a sigh of relief taking them off each night
A time to recover and prepare for tomorrow’s next fight
The reflection is dimmed, by the dust that gathers there
But can easily be wiped clean by tender soft loving care
Your imagery as always was terrific which made this a pleasurable read. Thank you for sharing this beatiful write. Take care and God Bless. Sandy
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Tnak you Shaz. It was a subject given to me to write about by an English teacher who was appraising my work at the time.
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wow
Daddy,this is amazing.I think whoever had read this piece will come to a better understading of the things around him.
So wonderful and great.
Shahrzad
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One of the more interesting entries in the contest so far.
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I like it, i can sing it...a good rythim and a good one for a journey.
Ghost -
Your usual excellence
How I view my shoes will never be the same again! --Ellis -
Thank you for your beautiful comments. I try to write what I feel and feel what I write, straight from the heart. Maybe I have it wrong, but that is what I believe in my own words.
Edited on Jan 11, 6:39 because 'Answer for wrong poem'. -
It is rerally a amazing work revealing the truth of the life through a verystrong metaphor here in this write through and through.The thoughts are very original aand bringing the pure and honest statements of the heart of the poet .The thoughts are very deep and touching the fact of the life ofcommon man ofoday which lives in various condition under various pressures and various dillemas.The atmosphere created here in this work is very factual and very natural too..The journey of the life shown through the life of the shoe is a great idea and very relevant to the mood of the thought presented in this work too. I really appreciate this work.prabhudayl khattar
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Yes but aa photo only shows one second of time. Shoes show days, months even years of a lifetime. One should keep all shoes from birth to follow his life. ha ha ha
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Hi i do think your shoes are nealy as good as a photo well your poem paint a lovly picture as well glad i read it thank you
keep it up -
Great write, I love how you have used the shoes as a focus point to get the writing across
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Baz' Extraordinary. An analogy, I could never have thought of, but how apt. Excellent comparisons! A metaphor for life ? Better get out my boot polish quick....lol
Again, beautifuuly expressed and written. Quite, unique.
WD -
Wow!! What a great write. I love my shoes... I take very good care of them; I'd like to think they're a reflection of my life lol. Well done!
~dramaqueen469~ -
wow!!!i can tell u love ur shoes but im glad u took it to a higher point and compared them to something. it helps show ur true insight...great write!!!!!















