Imagine that slice of ozone
Cut out like a piece of cake,
Eaten by pollution,
Giving us a headache.
Look at trees now stumps,
The living kingdom suffocating;
Carbon dioxide, stench of dumps,
And skies and waters blackening.
Carcasses lie around...
Oh, yes, they help humus,
But what's going to use the ground
If we, with all, are the dead ones?
Big cities, loads of stuffs,
Villages cut to concrete slabs;
Nature stolen, we wear the handcuffs,
Yet everyone blabs and blabs.
Shoot the animals, go!
Carve out their skin, their jewels...
Let someone do that to you;
Dice your flesh… What? Now you think it's cruel?
Oh, stop making me laugh!
"Humans are the smartest creatures."
Oh, are they even classified its half,
If we study and create destructive features?
Seriously, humans, who do you think you are,
Invading Mother Nature’s heaven,
Terrorising, digging permanent scars
In a place that’s granted to be our haven?
Go and learn, learn and save,
Be brave, you cowardly knaves!
Author notes
Written January 10th, 2006
A contest entry
- The Best of All Your Rhymes by One Angry Monkey.
600 points, ended February 11, 2008, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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Thanks for the entry, and I agree withh the sentiments of the piece but the inconsistancy of the rhymes looses some of the readability and enjoyabilityof the poem.
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expect no more from moi!
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thanks so much!!! these are my old ones.. it's a delight to get a comment on them once in a while.. thanks so much!
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WELL DONE!!!
My My! yet again, when I think this is ur best poem, u come up with another marvel and surprise me again,,u r really a GEM!!! Do I need say, that this poem was Mind-blasting as well!!! -
ola!!!
long time really dudette! gosh, my life is terrible at the moment with these exams running! they're eating the rotten brain cells outta me!!
what's up with you??
thanks so much for dropping by! really appreciate your take on this.
gosh i'm so sleepy.. but cant sleep!!
I have a contest to judge... so many entries!!! initially 84 submissions, and after removing a few, 70 something!
saaaaaave meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! -
thank you so much tia! your words are a delight. I'm glad you like this piece, thanks for your view. Your comment is very much appreciated.
blesses!
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thanks so much! I really appreciate all the words you've had to say on this. I do agree with what you say. Thanks for your views.
blesses!
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HEY GRL!!!!
m bac!! sorry for da due.. before dat-
u kno after i read this, u make me aware of the stench that humans have.. the stench of ungratefulness to their mother nature..
n as usual.. i love ur unique way of writin..
so how's life?!
Dudette. -
powerful
A powerfully thought provoking piece with a spin of sarcasm spitting through it. I enjoyed the write and your very descriptive take. Thanks for sharing this with us and keep up the excellent writing! -
good
this is thought provoking, descriptive and calls
all of humanity to answer the question "what are
you doing?" we need to stop and think more. yes
I liked the flow of this, the descriptiveness, the
imagery you used to make your point.
good job with this one. -
thanks so much maheo! well, that contest is actually over now, and this got me a silver! your comment is very greatefully appreciated! thanks!!
blesses!
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oh.. lol!! that's a wonderful comment you've made! flattering! Thanks so much! It's really appreciated! glad you like it.
blesses!
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nicely done........honest and true and I hope you have good luck in the contest.
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ah an eye opener this should have been on the agenda of th UNO this is good use of word to give a very important message
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Thanks so much for your kind and thoughtful words on this piece.
Yes, it is quite sad to see humans violating the land that gave birth to them. I guess I'm lucky to have swam through all the other good entries.
Your comments are a delight. Thanks loads again.
blesses!
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Merry meet CrystalPhoenix,
Congratulations on winning the Silver. I love the sentiment expressed in this poem. You penned it very well and as Antipodi said earlier:
"A very tight and well crafted piece ..the message was strong and it all came together in wonderful, even dark imagery."
There really isn't much more that I could add to that.
A sad statement on our so called "stewardship" of the only home we'll ever have. This was a tough competition with a lot of really good poetry penned from some really good poets. Congratulations again on your win.
Amythest -
lol.. nice expression! yes... this poem is slightly inclined towards sarcasm.
thanks for your kind and appreciated comment!
bless ya!
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quite pushy and lively. It is like getting a pie shoved in your face and someone saying how do you like that. it is sweet and sounds so cruel at the same time. I love things like that. keep up the good work. thanks for entering.
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hehe.... thanks a whole bunch on that! i'm glad you read around it.. bless ya!
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LOL The ending got me chuckling. Very well written and quite the mind opening experience. Well done and good luck.
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Thnaks loads! I appreciate the honour!
I'm sad to hear that you're sick... Get well soon!! keep that smile on your face, and believe me, you'll get better in no time!! good luck and energy with the judging!
bless ya! -
Thank you very much for entering. By this display of concern for the world we live in, you have already proven yourself goldworthy in my book. I am ill and have little energy so will leave this stock message so as to be able to concentrate my limited energy on judging properly the vast number of entries.
I am gratified by the turnout. Thanks again for your involvement.
Peace, Rob -
Thanks soo much!
love your comments!
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What a great write - flows so well and is easy to read and understand. Super rhythm and rhyme, says loads about environmental damage.
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thanks loads! personally i like this piece too.
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TELLITTOEVERYONE
A very tight and well crafted piece ..the message was strong and it all came together in wonderful , even dark imagery ...Good luck in the contest -
lol.. you're welcome! glad you liked this.. but I'd like to hear some of your 'contradictory' statements on this, if I could say that. What are those different views that were running through your mind while reading this piece?
Thanks for the comment!
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Thank you very much for putting your option number and my dog's name in the author's comment box. Most people find it fit to skip that, even though I asked specifically for them to do it in the rules. This is very well written and I liked it very much. In many ways I can agree with you, but many of my ideas are also very different from yours. I would also like to thank you for making sure there weren't any spelling or gramatical errors in your poem. I close for judging today, so best wishes!
Hollyann. -
yahoooo!
YAY!!! thanks loads!!! i tend to love nature so much, it's my stress buster. just looking outside and feeling its various gifts make me feel satisfied and whole. this poem is just a piece of my mind when I consider how we're treating mother nature. thanks again!!
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This was fucking awesome..... i wasnt exactly looking for something such as this but this defintely does work and i really feel strongly about this. Thank you for entering and good luck.
~Laura
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