behind dry branches
a pale moon tints the clouds
in silver-blue shade
dreams of a past summer
warm up my cold nights
Author notes
Written January 4th, 2006
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Hopefully there will be many fond summer memories to warm up those cold winters. I'd settle for a day alone to just sleep right now. My nose is running and people irritate me. This hasn't a thing to do with your poem but it does with the mood it put me in.
I see one of my idiot personae below. Time to put an end to those.
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This is wonderful, how you've painted an image with so few words. It's about using the right word to elicit the right thought for the reader. That's the key, I think, write well and find something that will spark the memory of the reader, I guess that's poetry right?
It was beautiful.
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excellent~
Oh I love Tanka's and haven't done one in eons it seems..this is beautiful....
This read like different shades of hues....
And seeing the contest title....The spirit of winter..I think you have the tanka perfectly penned for the contest...
Best of luck sis....
Its a winner in my book
Hugs
Susan~~~
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short!
but oh so sweet i truely idetify with the feeling
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Do like this form, and the soothing quality of this write. Vivid visual images are found in these five lines; giving so much life to this poem. easy to read and understand.
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Sooo nice!
Lovely moment of reflection in the dead of winter.
'a pale moon tints the clouds'
Patty
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Good!
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very reflective, definately speaks to the reader through it's simplicity.
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I love short poems. this was an excellent peom. i loved it.
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Short but true!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Although I am an avid lover of Winter, there were times I did wish for the begiining of summer to warm my winter nights as well. With this piece you made me think back to those frigid nights and remember winter's furious bite!!! although I have to say that here in the dead of summer I would mind feeling a few snowflakes landing on my nose about now!!!!...lol....Great job on expressing both summer and winter!!!~~Toni~~
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i am in agreement with the glance i caught of future summers then
especially as i am sat here right now wearing gloves with the fingers missing so i can type (and i still can't type very good - words keep getting muddled, but that's because i am rubbish at typing) and a hooded top sorry i am young and withit a hoody lol yo anyway. yes a good poem
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Wow, beautifully delicate!
I love:
"a pale moon tints the clouds
in silver-blue shade"
The whole Tanka radiates (the longing for) harmony!
Well done!
Cheers!
Ferenc
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Dreams of future summers warms my cold nights. Mainly because I have no good memories behind me to lean on. Sorry, I tend to see everything from my perspective...Need to get off my self-centered wagon...
"plunk" (that was me getting off the wagon...)
The imagery works, and is why I don't write poetry...those images just never jump out of my head. I just see bland, one dimentional things...wait, I thought I jumped off the "me" wagon...
"Ker-plunk." (There, now I'm off.)
Yes, the imagery works for me, and the poem, it's all about, not only that imagery but of hope...that in the future there will be moments like those you remember. Well Ms. Rising I'm impressed. -
Memories are a strong influence on how you view the world around you. Dreams of summer can go a long ways towards warming you in the winter. The seasons change ever faster and you only need hold out another couple months or so. We are getting closer to Spring each day.
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mmm this conjures up images curled under a duvet snuggled up against the cold of winter, well done
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Thanks for reading and for your very kind and lovely comment!
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this is a fabulous tanka ... great pivot line .... feeding from the top half into the bottom ... with a time lapse as well as kigo ... so very very nicely done ! ... a wonderful winter feel as well as technically beautiful .... >>>> EM
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Thank you for entering this shining example of tanka that I think is so neglected here in the Western World. I am a great fan of the 'short poem' and this one is beautifully done. I especially like how you have taken the opposite slant on Winter, with the longing for summer so apparent in your words.
I really cannot fault this work.
Good luck and best wishes ~ crisstiena
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