The vampire just lays there
In that coffin all day
Because light he can not bear
But when night comes there's only one thing to say
Blood.............Blood..................I need some blood to drink!
It is now 10 o'clock
He had a horrible toothache
So he went to his dentist and said "what's up doc"
Doc says I'm going to pull two teeth, the thirsty vampire says piece of cake
Two teeth............Two teeth........Then I can get something to drink!
The dentist pulls two of the vampire's teeth
Vampire says hm, I feel a little funny
Little did he know that he pulled his fangs out and placed bucks beneath
Mr.Vampire looks into the mirror and says you got me looking like Bugs Bunny
No...............No................No fangs, no drink nothing to drink!
Mr.Vampire leaves the office and yells out
Doc don't expect a tip, jerk
Thinking I most find a new dentist without a doubt
Then he sees a nice looking clerk
Yes..................Yes........................I can drink her dry!
The vampire flies up and grabs her
And goes in for the bite
But his new bucks don't work, he said why did I even bother
He looks up and says God of Vampires this is going to be a long night
Blood...........Blood..................I need some blood to drink!
Then he see an ugly ninja
Mr.Vampire flies up but this with a knife
Thinking I'm gonna to get some blood if I cut ya
But the ninja slices him almost taking his life
Ouch I'm hurt.........Ouch I'm hurt....... now I have no energy to fly!
Now since he can no longer fly
He thinks that he'll sneak up and cut someones face
Then he sees an old lady looking up at the sky
Knowing that this would be easy until she sprays mace
It burns............It burns................But I'm still thirst!
So he sees a little girl thinking she'll do
He quietly sneak up once more
Not knowing that she knew kung fu
She beats him on the floor
Why.............Why.................Why can't I get some blood to drink!
On the floor is where he lays
Why did this happen to me, and where's the Vampires Bite All Team?
Then Mr.Vampire opens his eyes
Yes! he says, It was just a dream!!!!!!
But he is still thirty!
Author notes
Man even I think this was stupid! But I was bored. Maybe you'll like it anyway.
Written January 1st, 2006
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Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Thanks! I don't normally write a lot humor. So thanks for reading!
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O gosh, this was not a piece of poetry, it was a small rhyming story, and quite funny if you ask me...well not laugh kinda funny, grrr...hate laughing, but good solid stuff here. you did a good job with creating a twist with a solid idea, and how a vampire has a bad day...because if hes having a bad dream then its during the day so therefor...bad day he he, oh yea the humor is killing me, no but really a good honest peice of work here.
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Thanks. I am glad that you like it. And if you like this I'm sure you'll like some more of my work.
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This poem doesn't suck and so doesn't the vampire in its dream. This is deffinantly different. I'll be reading more of your stuff! The Shaker
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very interesting concept love the imagery and it made me laugh good one Jay
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Thanks. And you're NOT chopped liver. You're a complete pure heart! Thanks cuzzy!
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Your humor is coming out and that is wonderful. All you needed was a little gold, hey what about me, Hahahaha, I guess I'm chopped liver. LOL. Ciao now.
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I can't believe you applauded this mess!
LOL! But thanks for your comment and applause. I do appreciate it!
Youe sis
~Jay~ -
ooo thirsty
HA! I find this humorous! I LOVED IT! ha.. but that's just me! GREAT JOB! Ha I think it's awesome sis!!!! It's different but that's what I like so much about it!!!! Great write!
~Amber~
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