Who Writes This?

I had a dream the other night,
I'm telling you here of that plight.
I dreamed Tiki and I had a fight
Over who writes the poems I write.

Ellis says it's me, but as you see
Tiki says this simply cannot be
Cause she's the one and it's not me
Who writes all of my poetry.

Well, all of this was just a dream.
Cooked up by Tiki -- it is a scheme
To un-nerve me and make me scream
By Tiki Cat who thinks she's supreme.

Well, I have got news for her.
No good poets I know concur.
They all say, "no cat wrote that," --
What I've written from where I sat.

Now I must show Ellis he's me.
You all know that I'm Tiki
Cause I've told you this before
That Ellis can't write at all anymore.

This is getting rather old
This story has already been told
And I know you all are sold
On Tiki Cat, whose poem you behold.

Thank you all for trusting me,
Your faithful feline cat, Tiki.
It's such a pleasure for me to see
You dumb humans believing me!

I have lied on every side.
I couldn't write if I tried.
I am the pet of a rat.
This rat writes; he's the cat.

But he is really not a cat.
He says he is and all of that,
And Ellis wrote from where he sat
Knowing nothing of my rat.

The rat is where this all begins.
He doesn't have any friends,
So he makes trouble all the time.
And people think the trouble is mine.

But I am innocent as the day is long.
I have never done anything wrong.
My morals and ethics are so strong
Up on my pedestal where I belong.

People all should worship me.
I made up the rat to see
If you're as gullible as I conceived.
And you are, I do believe!

Tiki Cat wins again
With a great big toothy grin.
You humans are going to end
And great cat life will then begin.

Tiki Cat