Dear Broken hearted,
  Why did you let him get away with that? How could you let him leave without knowing for sure that he understood how hurt you were? I know you love him, but why?. Why cant you be mad at him. What he did is unforgivable. Why do you put on that stupid happy face? It makes me sick. I know you haven't been happy in years. You walk around and to the world you seem perfect, but inside you are really screwed up!Don't lie you know it's the truth. You know that even those people that you call 'friends' don't even know you and they aren't really even your friends. If they were they wouldn't make you feel the way you are feeling right now...Would they? You know you have lived a pretty charmed life. Your parents love you and each other. Your family is pretty much great. No one beats you. You've never had anyone close to you die. You've never face hardships. You seem like a happy person. So whats wrong with you? Why can't you find happiness. I know you know where to look. I really wish that you were worth peoples love. I wish you weren't fake. If you could just fix all this crap maybe I could love you.
Sincerely,
yourself
Author notes
its been a pretty crap day...just need to get some stuff out...
Written December 27th, 2005
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Tyler, I know all too well about crappy days. Sometimes it seems like I have more of them than the good ones. But that’s just when I am feeling down and out. I hope your outlook on things has changed since you wrote this.
~ John
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Well, now I wish I had stayed up a little later for sure. I think I can figure some of this out but doesn't make it any easier for sure. Lots of questions up there too - just need to find some of the answers. Prolly hidden around there somewhere. Guh.
Paul
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