If only you knew,
How much I like you,
I'd feel much better,
If I had the guts to give you this letter,
But I don't,
So I won't,
Instead I will cry all alone,
I wish I had the guts to call your phone,
To think of this my heart is torn,
It feels like I've been stabbed with a thorn,
Maybe you just need a little time,
I wish you could read this rhyme,
But maybe we are together by fate,
Until your ready then I'll wait,
Inside I'm broken,
But people think I'm joking,
'Cause they don't realize,
The beauty I see in your eyes,
Now you may see,
The pain inside me.
Author notes
Something In The Way
A contest entry
- |Teenage Wasteland| xFuck Up's & Screw Up's Enter Herex by Dead Star--x.
300 points, ended June 15, 2007, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - JUST TWO DAYS TO REACH 1000 ENTRIES !!!! ( BE A PART OF THIS RECORD BREAKING CONTEST ) by Alex Hex.
300 points, ended May 1, 2008, 526 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter All Your Personal Writes Here (Part IV) by xxRainbowDawnxx.
900 points, ended May 24, 2008, 208 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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I hope you get the guts in the end as you never know, they may feel the same way for you as well.
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i like the message in this but the rhyme seems a little forced at times, i cant blame you i force rhyme a lot too-but i find if you just let the words come to you no matter what they are you can find a rhyme, you could use slant rhyme which helps a lot-example toe-control time-mind ect. thanx for entering & good luck!
PrettyX -
Very emotional with intense feelings.
Written straight from heart.
Best wishes,
manoj -
that was a really good poem.
"Inside I'm broken"
i love that line. it sounds so... idk... right.
but anywayy its a great poem. good job!!!
lovely lies -
wow...I really liked this a lot, it's so deep, It's amazing I liked the part:
But they don't realize
The beauty I see in your eyes
That was kewl
I loved this
keep it up
Love,
Heaven -
You are already in pain and I am wondering if the lingering pain is less than the pain if you were rejected. I myself would just say something, ask them out to dinner alone. See where it looks like it is leading and then make this decision. I think you might find She likes you too! The Shaker
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mmhm you wrote a very relateable poem. it's very sad though
but it flows very well and made me feel all your emotions I know this feeling so much like wow! I hope everything will be okay ♥ weetbix
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this is so beautiful and so full of emotion i felt this way once then i ending up meeting someone else you liked me but i still feel this way i hope it works out for you in the end great poem
nyx -
This is word for word exactly how I'm feeling right now. Wonderful poem, it expresses this topic so well. Keep on writing.
Blessed be,
LeFay -
oh man, how I remember these days so well, its like you don't know what people are thinking and your trying to figure out if this person likes you, now this is what I like, but hey you never know of what might can happen, I hope for the best for ya. godbless, and good luck in your contest.
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thats really lucky, i am 15 and my friends dad's gf thougt i was 19! ya, i have met someone who liked me and then i was a total b*tch to him and now he hates my guts. its horrible.
Brittany -
thank you!
Brittany -
thanks you, that feeling really sucks, especially when the person i like knows how i feel and they do nothing except make me jelious by making out in front of me. -sigh- life sucks!
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this was a great poem, u deserved to win i know that exact feeling, good job
josh -
fantasticness!! exactly what i was looking for!! im so pleased with entry... thanks so much!
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Beautiful
Man I know how you feel. I have a friend that I think is the Hotness but he is just a friend and nothing more and I feel that I am just satisfied with friendship. I really felt this poem and I think that it went well with the contest. Good Luck -
Yeah it does...but Im like the only person like me here so kjgdf5ectr76k bkfrcx--sorry my cat just walked over the key board...Im lucky though...I look 2 years older than I realy am so I have more choice when it comes to girls but still the pickings are slim...have you ever had it when some one liked you and then you go along and insult them,you feel kinda crapy after woulds...
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usually when i say hott, i dont mean looks, i mean stuff like nice personalities, caring etc. but there r none here, and i agree on the liking someone who doesnt like u, it suks
Brittany -
I hear you...looks is no problem for me...but all of them have 1)crap personalities 2)too goody-too-shoes or 3) has tried to do an exorcisim on me...some of the girls hear are realy hot but the rest sucks...and if there is a person you like then they never like you!
Mike -
ya, i kno, the person i like, 1)has a girlfriend 2)already likes someone else(my best friend) 3)i agree, there is no hot guys in my skool
Brittany -
Sucks dosent it...but its worse when you like that person and you think your ready to ask them when they go and ask some one else out...or in my case you cant find people often that you like...dam my school sucks...
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i kno, i have been in this situation for so long, i cant wait to forget about it.
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Damm Ive felt like this before...but you eventully get over it ...after a few years...it flows and is an easy read
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