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Natural High

 

Let me shelter you
from the storm. I'll save you from
drowning in loneliness. Pluck you from the
rising tides of love's absence. Wrap you in my arms
when the night cold is too much for you to bear. With
velveteen lips I'll kiss away the tears of past heartaches. Let
my silken touch caress your flesh like the dew upon a blooming
flower in the spring. Allow my body to envelop you in a sphere of
euphoric heaven you've never known before. Let me ignite the flames
of desire and passion within your soul. Allow me to smother those
feelings of longing and yearning that reside in you. Grant me the honor
and pleasure of a good night kiss and once again, good morning. Let me
be your reason to smile, as you are mine. I'll be an ear to listen when you
need to talk, and your rock when you need a place to lean. With hungry
emerald eyes I can seduce you into submission and devour you from
head to toe. I can leave you gasping for air, but I'll never leave you
alone. With me you can experience all the pleasures of your every
last fantasy. Close your eyes and take a ride on a tidal wave
of passion and desire. Allow yourself to feel the quake
of my volcanic eruption caused by your most
innocent touch. Press your lips to mine
and let me intoxicate you with a
taste of me. Like a drug, I am
addictive. One simple
touch, one sweet
kiss and you
will be
on a


N
A
T
U
R
A
L




H
I
G
H

Author notes


Written December 16th, 2005

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Comments

1 - 26 of 26

  • AnnD Moderators member
    January 29, 2008

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    Again this is most beautifully formed, your words are so sensual and loving, They flow perfectly and ooze sensuality. Beautiful work Bel.

    Ann


  • looking forward
    November 14, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    it's been a long time since i've seen such artisty in a poem not only the form but in the language you have a gift


  • mynameisnoone
    November 8, 2006
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    This is my favorite thus far. I really have nothing bad to say about it. It is sincere and gentle. Everything about it screams love in every sense of the word. I think the style was perfect and your expressions were practically bleeding on the page. Thanks for entering.


  • darkeyes08
    October 14, 2006
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    wow, this is by far better then anything i have read so far, best of luck!!


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    September 16, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Bel,
    This is a wonderful piece; I loved it!
    You have a way of always blowing my mind with your awesome talents! Well done!


  • Celticmoon
    January 27, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Stu,

    I wholeheartedly thank you for your critque on this piece. Your editorial critque and suggestions have been taken into consideration and thus put into effect as of this moment. Once again I thank you


  • Stuart Higginson gold member
    January 27, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Hi Celticmoon

    More critiques are being posted throughout the next two days. Thank-you for submitting this entry. I will begin by getting the Editorial out of the way, and will then focus on the Topical Critique


    EDITORIAL:
    ^^^^^^^^^


    Line 4: "loves" needs an apostrophe ("love's"), as the tides are pertaining to/belonging to the love.

    Line 5: The second "too" (at the line's end) should be "to".

    Line 14: As this line follows-on from the previous, and is in itself quite long, perhaps consider punctuating it a little. When reading, I found a good place to put a comma, to break the reading task down a little, would be to use a comma directly at the end of "talk".

    TOPICAL/SUBJECT CRITIQUE:
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

    Having formerly developed a negative eye for visual artistry in poetry, due to many of the endeavours of writers to show their individuality, which I have witnessed, ranging from the bizarre to the unfathomable, I must take this opportunity to give acclaim when my opinion is altered. Having viewed several pieces of your work of recent weeks, and having found each relatively flawless both in visual and written artistry, I was very anticipative - in a positive way - upon noting your entries. I would go so far as to suggest that you host a Contest or two, examplifying your work to help others to learn how honed craft and careful attention can lead to the creation of both an enjoyable piece of writing and an equally eye-pleasing piece of textual art I was stunned by both shape-poetry entries you submitted in this Contest

    This poem is very powerful, in its expression of your desires, wishes and intentions toward/upon your lover, and indeed upon the love you both share. One of the strongest aspects of this poem to me, was its wonderful sense of "giving". So much of love poetry covers a selfish angle, or can be one-dimensional, yet you have openly declared what you would do for - and to - your lover; what you would inspire in them, give to them; how you would make them feel etc. This is poignant to me, as I do tire of "angst poetry" which blatantly reveals a person has gone into a relationship with all eyes on their need for security and emotional stability being satisfied, while forgetting seemingly that the other person would have needs too. There is no such selfishness, I feel, in this poem. You weave wonderful sentiments throughout, and blend romance, spirituality, nature and erotica as if you were a lyrical seamstress, stitching the threads of words into the pattern of sentences. The flow was virtually oceanic, sweeping the reader along, while the content itself never faltered into weakness. ie your strong beginning, declaring how you would shelter them from storms (I interpret: protect them from sorrow, appeasing their fears and helping in troubled times); and wrapping them against the night cold (keeping them warm with love and companionship and, maybe too, a flame of passion); also speaking of your desire to bring them healing by kissing away the "tears of past heartaches". The erotica is sensual and as erotica should be in its true nature, not overriding or graphic, nor does it overwhelm the more subtle or gentile emotional matter.

    This is an astonishing piece, and I am sure there will be many others who will share in my view

    Many thanks for submitting this and giving me an opportunity to read it

    Stuart


  • Whispered Devotions
    January 9, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    *sighs* I am breathless after reading this. I loved this beyond belief.. it is one of the best pieces I have ever read. So gorgeous and sensual. Oh I have not enough great words for this.. Honestly I just about died reading it. Thank you for entering my contest.. and I need not wish you luck because you have taken the path into your own hands.. and luck has nothing to do with it.


  • ShadesXofXGray
    December 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I really like this one and you captured the title perfectly.. I definately was excited by this one.. because you not only offered pleasure but you offer security and love and passion. great job you scored an 11 out of 10!
    Love,
    Kid


  • Shane Toona
    December 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    woop

    Woot. You have this contest won hands down.


  • Soul-2-Soul
    December 20, 2005
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    well, first off, one of my all time favorite songs is called Natrual High, so you get plus points for that...2nd of all i agree with darrell in that the one receiving this is truly blessed...and 3rd, this is the second i've seen of your "shape" poetry and you do an excellent job at it...and 4th, your words flow so eloquently that its hypnotic and truly reaches one's soul...


  • darell
    December 17, 2005
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    eloquent!

    WOW WOW WOW!!! I sorry my dear but there was nothing natural
    about that high! It was more like, "A SUPERNATURAL HIGH!"LOL!
    Again, your writing is exquisite and oozing with romance and
    sensuality. Anyone fortunate enough to recieve a fraction
    of this kind of love would be blessed!

  • dramaqueen63x
    December 16, 2005
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    this is great. i love the words you use and how you use them, its just... its great. im wordless, you put so much detail behind it. theres definitly a story behind this, if not then u are just really really good. haha keep it up
    <3 sam

  • Celticmoon
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you kindly my dear..
    I am pleased you enjoyed this piece.


  • Celticmoon
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Aww Rob,
    Thank you hun. You always say the sweetest things
    I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece.


  • robert bolin
    December 16, 2005
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    Two words for this poem " Breath Taking " Amazing vivod images that makes ones own heart skip a beat when they are heplessly drawn into the sweet caress of your poetic weaves of enchantingly beautiful and brilliantly penned and powerful web of poetry rob..


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Breath-taking, awesome, beautiful, sensual, and all around "MY GOSH THIS IS GREAT!!!" Wow! And even that is an understatement! Loved this to the nth degree and beyond! Well done, my friend! Hugs, Sandy


  • Andy Stephenson
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    You definitely are writing well. This poem certainly drew me in. You may make me jealous. Is it supposed to be a balloon? Probably. I hope everything goes well for you with your new love.


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    passionate~

    Beautiful passionate and sensual sis
    All rolled into one
    Looks like it's shaped in a rose
    Very creative there sis and love this sensual poem
    My my it's gotten warm in here
    Love n hugs
    Susan~~~


  • Celticmoon
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    LMAO....
    My dear brother you are too funny. As for viagra.....I would hope he doesn't need it but if that's what it'll take to have him keep up (no pun intended) with me, then so be it......LOL


  • Abdul T Alishtari
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    Abdul Tawala Ibn Ali Alishtari

    Sis, you are one really beautiful sensitive creature. Whomeever gets you better take his one a day vitamins and LOL viagra. God bless you. Ciao for now.

    Abdul Tawala Ibn Ali Alishtari


  • Violet Moodswing Greeters member
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Very beautiful wording and I love the form you used. The language you use paints a picture for the reader even without the benefit of the photograph. The photo is a nice touch thought


  • Celticmoon
    December 16, 2005
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    The day is not the matter for romance but instead the inspiration for it that makes all the difference.

    Glad you liked this piece hunny.


  • Iohagh
    December 16, 2005
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    My you are romantic today. Nice write.

  • Celticmoon
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Awww shucks!

    Thanks sis!
    I do so always appreciate your sweet words.


  • Sunkissedrose
    December 16, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, very powerful, very seductive. You still got it hon. Thanks so much for sharing this piece with us.

    ~Carrie

1 - 26 of 26