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Within the Midst of Angels



 
Within the midst of angels
Who bow in utter shame
Embarrased by your beauty
And the music of your name
You stand in solemn silence
On a pedestal of gold
And watch with frightened eyes
As your destiny unfolds


For a moment you are happy
Lost inside a peaceful dream
Where you walk among the rainbows
And you dance upon moonbeams,
But a rainbow cannot touch you
Or hold you close at night,
And you cannot kiss a moonbeam
Or make love to its light


So you cry in solemn silence
On a pedestal of gold
And you watch with frightened eyes
As your destiny unfolds
Standing in the midst of angels
Who all bow in utter shame
So embarrased by your beauty
And the music of your name


\

Author notes

R a k e r m a n 1

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • • if you would please space your name out in your AN like this : X x D r o w n . M e . D r y X x . Just out a space between each of your letters. Please. If you chose not to thats fine but i would like you you give me a reason.


  • Darkened Seraph
    January 18, 2008

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    This is fantastic, the flow in this is excellent, and the words all complimented each other really well, that last stanza was an excellent ending to this poem and worked rather well with the title too, well done with the gold to

    Seraph


  • Errant Panther gold member
    November 28, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Nice rhyme and creative visuals, interesting format you chose to package this in. well done and best wishes.


  • Aesthete
    May 19, 2007

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    That was completely wondeful. Definitely one of the best I've read so far. Your a very good writer Rakerman


  • Death of the Author
    April 29, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    Hey this is amazing man, absolutely amazing. Are you the same person who wrote Rumours of Angels, because I would love to give them both trophies but alas I think that is a bit unfair on the other competition, who are pretty good too. I suppose I will have to choose my favourite! You are too good at these! Well anyway good luck, you've got a great chance. I love the symmetry of this. Take care dude xox


    • Rakerman1
      April 29, 2007
      Edit | Reply
      lol....yeah I'm the same guy I'm glad you like them and thanks for your kind words.


  • daZed and confuZed
    December 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Aww! You are so good with words and your rhyming is perfect. Never once does it sound forced. And the flow- perfect also. You're a wonderful poet!

    keep up the great work!

    xox--Dana


  • December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Wow, amazingly beautiful.

  • orangebob05
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    It was a very moving piece of work. Keep the words coming from your brain to your hand.


  • xXxbecca10o8o7xXx
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    this is a really great poem and i loved it keep it up you are a great writer and this is a great write keep it up i loved this keep it up!!! i really enjoyed reading this thanx for sharing with all of us here at allpoetry!!
    LoVe Ya
    ~*BeCcA*~

    you are a great writer
    keep up the great and awesumly awesum work!!!


  • Symphony
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This really *was* breathtaking, especially the imagery regarding nature, and then the comedown that they arent physically there .... really enjoyed reading this!


  • Heavenly Angel silver member
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    oh how beautiful this is! The imagery and those beautiful words combined make for a breathtaking piece! Thank you so much for sharing; this is fabulous!

  • vertigo beat
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    The beauty that is descirbed here doesn't seem skin deep, atleast to me. It seems like an inner beauty. This girl who lives in here dreams, so free, (dancing and singing in harmony is how I view her) lives in so many girls out there. This girl needs to come out into reality . Yet the piece is so sad. Lonely and hurt at the thought of reality. Reminds me of someone . Beautiful write, great rhyming, lovely form. All I can say is keep writing...
    ~^~Tiya~^~


  • Touchof1der silver member
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I sit here breathless after reading this. You have taken me into your grasp and held me completely spellbound and captivated by the images that have been ever so carefully woven throughout your words here. You display such an amazing talent for writing with clarity and style. Each well chosen word goes down rich and smooth, like fine wine and they leave me thirsting for more. You have fueled my imagination with awesomely vivid imagery and a vibrant perception. You have ever so gently touched the depth of my soul. Don’t ever lay your pen down my friend.
    ♥ touchof1der

  • thatonekid777
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Good....nuff said.


  • Ethereal One gold member
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    excellent writing

    Your words express the loneliness of this person. Being beautiful, walking among rainbows, and dancing on moonbeams is all a very wonderful idea. Beauty cannot make you happy or take the loneliness away. The message you deliver here is a very important one. I enjoyed reading this one.
    etherealforu


  • Unspeakable Tears
    December 14, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    beautiful. absolutly beautiful. loved it! keep it up!


  • Lyrical Soul silver member
    December 13, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I got to thinking about my comment and realized that didn't come out right I was only saying that I could identify with her being alone and living in dreams....see you got me all messed up with this one.
    Edited on Dec 13, 7:26 p.m. because 'still dreaming, still messed up'.


  • Lyrical Soul silver member
    December 13, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Gosh Raker. I'm at a loss for words this time. The only thing that comes to mind is "I understand this girl" and "beautiful". That's all I can say to this one.

    ~Lyrical

1 - 19 of 19