My Loving Mother
This poem that I'm writing you,
can't show you what I feel.
This poem only touches some points
that are so very real.
You, the one that stood by me
when all others had gone.
You, the one that held my hand,
in the dark before the dawn.
You led my way when I was lost,
showed the difference of right and wrong.
Helped me through my troubled times,
stood beside me and sung my song.
You helped me win when I was down
by doing what you could do.
And all in all I have to say
that I really love you.
When my greatest triumph comes
don't think that I will forget.
The one that adopted me at A.P.,
the one that wouldn't quit,
My Loving Mother
Author notes
She was always there for me even when no one was there for her!
A contest entry
- For Our Parents by WhiteAngelCake.
700 points, ended August 18, 2008, 28 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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I really like this poem. Good luck in the contest!
-WhiteAngelCake -
Thank You!
I thank you for your comments. On the issue of the "your" "You're" thing. I meant for it to be "you" I added a pause (comma) because when I read it I pause after the word "You" in those lines. Try that and see if you get what I was doing! Thank you all for your thoughts. So many read, but so don't ever give their opinions, that I love each and every one I do get! The Shaker -
Your poem's good it sounds like you have a good mom.I loved your poem. I have a mom that's as nice as yours and she Loves me very much! Your good at writing poems. I hope your whole life is just as you want and may God bless you and your family!
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This is absolutely beautiful. Your mother sounds like a wonderful person and she is lucky to have such a talented poet for a child. Keep writing.
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Exquisite
Oh, Tony, what a wonderful, beautiful tribute to your mother. She will be in tears when she reads this one! I would be!
Sometimes, as parents, we wonder if the "right" things we did will overshadow our "mistakes," or will it be the other way around. We only know when our kids let us know. Praise the Lord, you are doing it for your mother and mine have done it for me.
I did notice a couple of editing issues: 1) "You the one that stood by me" -- You/You're; 2) "You the one that held my hand," -- You/You're. Otherwise, this piece is exquisite and I know your mother will love it. You should frame it for her!
Lots of love and hugs, SisB♥n
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You the one that held my hand,
in the dark before the dawn."
this was my favorite part in the whole poem, there is so much meaning in these few little words. the poem is very meaningful and i am sure that your mother will get just how you feel out of this poem. i can tell how grateful you are and how much you love her.. keep up the good work and thank you for sharing your work
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So soft and tender. Touching the deepest recesses of the heart. You surely know how to reach in and tug at the heart strings. Each stanza tugs a little more. A beautiful heartfelt tribute to your mom. I'm sure there will be tears wetting the eyes when she reads this! I know mine would.
~Michelle~
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WHAT A WONDERFUL TRIBUTE !! I WOULD BE GLAD IF YOU COULD ENTER IT IN MY MOTHERS DAY CONTEST !! BEST WISHES TO YOU !! AND YOUR GREAT WRITE !
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this really spoke to me...i love my mother and this just expresses how well it makes u think about her. great job!! keep writing!!
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Excellent work. Your mom would be proud of you. great flow and language in this piece. once again great job, and keep up the good work
John =) -
I love this. Such a beautiful tribute to your mother! Way to go!
Allen0826 -
Fabulous
A wonderful tribute the words are so touching and inocent. I loved the flow of the piece it drew me in. Fabulous -
aah! what a beutiful poem especially when you write about your mother, her love and affection and what all she has done for you! lol! a great poem! keep it up.
Warm regards,
Ganesh -
I feel the same way about my Mother. This is a beautiful, loving, heartfelt tribute to ALL the incredible Mums out there ... without them, NONE of us would be here. Well done, Shaker
rose
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This is very sweet. Your mother sounds like a wonderful person. I like your word choices, they were very simple but I liked them. Thank you for entering my contest.
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this poem you are describing your mother and I can see how much she meant to you it has so much emotion. What a wonderful write because you are describing most loving mothers. You did a great job with this one. Thanks for entering the contest.
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Oh, this is very beautiful, and such a wonderful tribute.
Thanks for sharing and best luck to you in the contest hun. You mother was very lucky to have you as her child. For i can see that you loved her very much.
Tammy
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another wonderful tribute/ dedication, to a wonderful lady..I thank god for mine everyday as well.. very special poem here my friend.. thank you for sharing..Linda
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Well, this poem really better win some metal, because it had me in tears!! Now, I am a little emotional, I will give you that, I lost my mom to cancer two years ago, but you just described her/us to a tee!! My mom was my biggest fan! I miss her so much, I had to click on this and I wasn't dissapointed.
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Hey!!
I just wanted to stop in and thank you for entering your poem in my contest. Ive been down a rocky road, to say the least, and now with my daughter I know I'd do anything and everything to be there for her, support her and be the mother that I never had.
Once again, thanks for entering, and good luck!!
Mal
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