For months, I choked on secret words
that rose bile-like behind my tongue...
an acrid verbal gorge that was
less terrifying to gag down again
than to spew into deliberate existence.
Today, I couldn’t hold them back and those
bitter words flew unfettered from my throat –
guttural utterances sporting stiletto heels.
I watched them tango across your consciousness,
and was surprised to find that only I'd
been bloodied by their passage. All this time,
I thought it was you I was protecting.
Author notes
Written December 6th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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it is like acid burning up the page, outstanding metaphor and i know this feeling all too well, how wonderful your ability to describe this, the sour bitterness of the emotion, so real i had to drink a soda to settle my stomach, lol...it was just too good. incredible to know another can effect you in such a way, and this is too honest to let me think it came from imagination, you have lived through this. well done.
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there have been so many times when i have wanted to just say to someone exactly what was on my mind like a script had been written for just such a purpose.the words would be spoken in the exact fashion that would let the person know how i felt and put my mind at else.i sat on the thought for months and at the worst moment possible those carefully rehearsed words come spewing out in the most venomous ton with a cache of emotions that make you appear abnormal.you say the most foulest and hurtful things.the problem is it may have been well deserved and long overdue,but when you are at heart,a truly kind and loving person,those biting words leaves their marks much more on you than they ever could the person they were directed at.i was thrilled to see a write from you and as expected a most brilliant one,a most profound one.this was a powerful one in context as well as content.i must thank you sincerely for returning with a bookmark moment for me.
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Life Lesson
Sounds like someone had a moment of exceptional clarity. This should go into Life's Lessons list. When the student is ready the teacher appears.
Can I use poem (credit always given where due...or I'll leave it anonymous if you prefer) in my daily daily reading that I post for a couple of groups? -
I love the words you used "acrid verbal gorge"...very clever. The message and thoughts of this poem are very blunt and also witty
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Whoa. What a treat. A profound metaphysical realization brilliantly presented - we hurt ourselves when we hurt others. We fantasize about "getting even" and setting people straight but when we actually do, our souls are degraded and we are sad that the words had to be spoken at all.
My dad says I have "a tongue that could clip a hedge" because now and then, I blow a gasket and chew someone out. It feels good to slam someone for a moment, but then the guilt sets in about how I might have handled the situation better.
Great message, beautifully crafted. Bookmarking this one. Thanks.
Mark -
‘The teeth that bite the claws that snatch!’ Really good encapsulation of the situation – the conclusion is sharp and poignant. Does this mean that you will finally release that deadly clutch you have on your own throat… ‘One more step and I squeeze!’ I hope to seeˇ!
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Whew! Like John, I am arrested by your use of 'stilleto heels' and 'tango'. The above comments pretty much cover my feelings about these well-penned lines. I was surprised at the conclusion of your poem, though. Makes me think of that old commercial for margarine: "It's not nice to fool Mother Nature!" And lighting strikes. Unpredictably. Just hate it when the wrong one gets burned!!
I think of you often. Hope you are well.
Edited on Dec 06, 10:13 p.m. because ''. -
wow. so cliche to say, but this expresses exactly the kind of internal debate i've been going through recently. i was amazed to hear it expressed with such eloquence...and rawness at the same time.
*goes to read again*
i really like the phrase, "deliberate existance" ...when you finally say "it" (whatever it is that you let out), it feels like such a planned event, rather than the "guttural utterance" that it actually is.
not only could i connect with every line you wrote, but i felt every line as well. this was a very gutteral poem, and thats where it hit me
amazing imagery and pinpointing of emotions.
i really enjoyed this. it made me think...
thank you so much.
-lee-
Edited on Dec 06, 8:51 p.m. because ''. -
Very descriptive images with the stiletto and the tango. Hot blooded Latin passion leading to great self-discovery.
A powerful read.
John. -
I really like this poem of yours. I don’t suppose life ever gets any easier but you describe the struggle of understanding interpersonal relationships very well. What was it someone once said “I love humanity, it’s the people I can’t stand. This is heartfelt and genuine and very descriptive of your pain and difficulty with truly brilliant images. It is nice to have you writing, even if it is just to clear the air of a clouded room. Blessings and best wishes, richard
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This has wonderful sharp imagery for feelings and words, especially the sound of "gutteral utterances". It's true too, our feelings are private, even if we choose to share them.
It's good to see you back.
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