A dozen roses in a crystal vase,
Reflecting a child's pretty face.
Bright red roses her father's pay,
Twelve red promises he'd be back someday.
One red rose for her chipped front tooth,
And one for her stolen youth.
One red rose for the cut on her head,
And one for both times she'd bled.
One red rose for her now torn clothes,
And one for her broken nose.
One red rose for her blackened eye,
And one for the tears she'd cried.
One red rose for the burn on her back,
And two more for each rib he cracked.
The petals fall one by one,
When the last one falls he'll have his fun.
He'll beat and batter her body once more,
And buy her silence from the flower store.
Filling her heart with broken dreams,
And a vase full of promises, to silence her screams.
Author notes
Written November 29th, 2005
Jessica Peery
What did you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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Hearbreaking, yet powerful. This just blew me away. WELL DONE and thankyou so much for entering this piece.
~*~DramaQueen469~*~ -
aw... this is sad.. but good!
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i wish i had the words to say how i feel about this poem... i was a child sexual abuse survivor...but things werent very bad or abusive for me...it was mostly inappropriate touching and advances...which made me sick...and sometimes it's hard to get over sickness that isn't intense...sometime i wish it had been intense so i could just wipe it out with hatred...but i'm always left with the doubts of "was it bad enough to be hated???" and it makes getting over it harder!!
i really liked this poem coz of it's beautiful rhyme and the way each rose depicts the ways he's hurt her... i really like the part about the stolen youth, the cut on her head and both the times she bled... it is so beautifully entwined in words that it actually carries deep into the recesses of the heart and mind and touches it with such force it makes you want to cry with disgust!!
dear lord....
I should stop
I love you poetry darling
Luv
VidZ -
This piece is good, it holds much power and suspense in the middle and the symbolism of the rose works very well. It holds a lot of truth in the idea of promises and apologies which buy a persons silence. It is different from many poems I have read and I guess this in a ay adds to its powe
Thanks for entering -
I saw that one too-mine was different-and mine was wrote before that one. The other rose poem was good tho.
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Someone else submitted a poem about a dozen roses aswell... The poem was different, but I think that's curious.
I loved the poem. It flowed, had good imagrey, and I could picture everything that was said.
Nice poem. -
That was quite a piece, I was trying to figure out why the entires that won, well won, and this one I understand completely, the only i dont understand about this piece is why it did not place first, this was so beautifully put and so sad at the same time, the words graced this piece in such perfection, amazing job!!
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i loved how the roses represented each time something happaned and hte emotion you put into this! Amazing poem!
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Wow, this is intense...very full of emotion, with lovely imagery...the only thing that kind of bothered me was the unnecessary comma breaks in the middle of some lines...but bla on that...great job! ^_^
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This is a really good poem, i enjoyed it a lot. I found however, that the commas in each line, for example
"And one for, her stolen youth"
I found that the commas disrupted the flow of the poem, and it would be easier to read without the pause. The punctuation at the end of the line does work however. But this is merely my opinion.
I found the contents of the poem very well written though, very unique idea. Keep the ink flowing hun, and best luck in the contest
xoxox
-faerie-
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AW that was a really nice thing to say! Thank you, I'm glad you liked it. I'm very proud of this poem and the feedback it's gotten.
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Wow.
This is absalutely amazing.
The rest of the competitors in my contest have submitted excellent work.
But none of which I have applauded, like this piece.
Feel very proud of this, because I only give up my points to people who leave me in awe with their poetry.
Good luck in the competition! -
wow this poem is so sad. i hate the fact that stuff like this happens everyday. people hurt other people and try to bribe them not to tell. in most cases the victims fall into depression. thanx for commenting on my poems
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mmhmm
You have a lot of applauds to this one and you deserve each and every one. This brought me to tears...but like it matters, lol. I love how you said about "buying her silence from the flower store"...my favorite line from the whole poem. This is so sad and powerful. Great job, and good luck in the contest, but like you'll need it
Jeanette*~ -
wow this is a very deep and emotional piece.. i love the symbolism however morbid (the tragic part is the true nature of this piece)... i like the symbolism of this piece about how its not just roses ur talking about but any bribe... the beginning part leaves u wondering exactly what is going on (making the reader curious and enthralled) where as in the middle, u suddenly realize and ur heart drops along with ur jaw realizing the true sadness and heart-renching nature (i am sorry for repeating taht word)... i too, love the imagery of the fallen petals tho most of all i lvoed the line:
"And buy her silence, from the flower store"
for sum reason that line just struck a chord... amazing job. best of luck!
Yours,
FlavoredPoison -
so sad!
Woah, this is so sad.
The imagery is beautiful. It makes me want to cry so much.
Amazing! -
I've read a lot of poems on child abuse, most sound the same. You came at it from a different aspect. The roses did it. They make it special, unique. Very good job. I really enjoyed reading it. Shancy.
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Great write.nice rhyme.But it was sooooooooh good and emotional.Actually the theme of roses was fantastic.Great write.keep it up.Cheers.
~AJ~
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Imagine. Imagine that someone buys silence with a vase of roses, as a sorry excuse for what has been done, just to be repeated again, and again, and again... Thank you for sharing this with us! I applaud you. Best of luck in the contest! Jim
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OMG this was absolutely amazing. You absolutely blew me away with the last lines. The whole concept of the flowers each standing for something was brillant,great great write!
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*speechless*
This is such a sad poem . . . but beautifully written nonetheless.
The last line was perfect, it finished the poem amazingly.
Stay smiling and keep writing
Pol -
It is very sad, I could picture it in my head as I read it. Great job with this idea. There were some commas in some odd places, but oh well. Overall, I liked it. Good luck in the contest.
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WOW!!! This poem was absolutely AMAZING!! The rhyme scheme was flawless, and it flowed verrrry nicely!!!! I think this poem, wonderful though it is, is soo veyr sad. To think of a father who would do this to their child is sickening... I am glad this is not your true story... Great Poem and the Best of Luck in the Contest!!!!!!!!!!
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a beautiful portrail of buying a childs silence trully amazing *autumn*
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Wow, this was amazing, it really brought a tear to my eye, it makes me sick to think that there are people in this world that get to live and act like this everyday. I wish they would all die a horrible death. I know that sounds horrible but they deserve it, great poem hun. I entered this contest too good luck in it. xxx QueenT ooo
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