AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tear soaked pillow
Pressed into the lonely girls face
She screamed
Screamed until she was hoarse
Screamed for her father
Cried for her sister
Sobbed for her mother
Screaming....poetry....
Her only outs now
Her only way to deal
Her father hates her
And avoids her as much as he can
Her sister...her sister rebels
And confides her secrets to this girl
Not knowing that the more secrets
She is telling the girl
The more she is
Fanning the flames of her
Suicidal Fire
Her mom, who is totally
In the dark about it all
She wants to tell her mom
But she is afraid it will break
Her beloved mothers heart to pieces
She just wanted to
END IT ALL
Maybe that would solve all of her problems
Because she has no one to turn to
To relieve the weight she is always
Carrying around on her shoulders
She just CAN'T help everyone
No matter how big her heart is
So that night,
As she wept
Crocodile tears on her pillow
The little heater she had in her room
Was piled under books and papers
And plugged into the wall
Along with four other appliances
Hopefully, it will look like an accident
The flames lept higher and higher
As she just lays there on her bed
Lost in her thoughts
Trapped in her mind
Feeling nothing as the
Flames consume her.....
Author notes
NOT GOING TO COMMIT SUICIDE!!! Just ranting or whatever! Usually a really happy person, just those occasional dark moments!
I commented on "Stolen" by Siren & "Psycho Ducky" by slipknotpoet666
Written November 26th, 2005
A contest entry
- Strong Emotions by AmoreEMorte.
375 points, ended December 17, 2005, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
awesome
Well I must say...you are very good and putting the wright words together, and make it flow. I have found in my own personal experience, that all of our poetry had some sort of true feeling behind it. Maybe it was a friend, or maybe it was just the only was to express your emotions...but whatever it was that lead you to this...you put it on paper so very well. And I'm glad you added the "I'm not going to commit suicide", cux alot of us was worried. Anyway, thanks for sharing, and keep up the great work!! -
oh goodness. This is truly amazing. Give me a minute to absorb it all....WOOOOOOW!!!! This is so incredible! I want to read it again!Wow. I'm so ... i dont know. Speachless i guess! This is really good. I guess we all feel like the weight of the world is on our shoulders, and we want to let it off but its so hard and im sure we have all thought about suicide more than once, i know most ppl are usually happy - im always a happy person, but i do feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. This is great write. Great imagery - keep this up! I encourage you to KEEP WRITING!!! let me know when you get a new poem, i'll come check it out!
All my love
Stephani -
omigod, im crying right now, its like, so real, u r amazing
-
HEY! Here I am again...LOL. This sent a shiver down my spine. Maybe because I'm scared of fire and you wrote about you burning up in it. I can see a pattern forming with your family in almost every poem I've read. It is because what you're saying is the truth, or you just like writing about a dysfunctunal family. Either or, you're really good at it.
>>> Catalyst (again) <<< -
Well. Very impressed! Glad its not true, though!!! Just want you to know that I got a new poem, but it might be hard to comprehend. Just tellin ya
crazy gurl from da crazy south! -
Hi Dances, I have to admit I was totally relieved to read you poets comments.. great entry for this contest. Having dark moments like these can be exhausting and I am glad that you are able to vent in your poems!! Take care and Good luck with the contest!! Jasmine
-
Wow this is very dramatic. loved how you had it look like an accident so she would hert her family and mom less
-
Well first the title really got my attention.... Now for the poem... I got scared reading the first part.. lol j/k...anyway.. wow I only read the first half so far and IT kinda sounds like me... continuing.... wow.. I never even thouhgt of that... I got a little heater in my room.. This is a very unique poem.. Great work. keep writing and have an uber shiny day!
-
You really weren't joking about that heater. Pyro freak...lol. Great job and throughout the whole poem I felt sorry for the girl. Good luck in the contest, you're going to do great.
Schmitty
-
good luck and great write
I really enjoyed reading this piece. I think the imagery was outstanding and I really got into this poem. I can relate to the feelings here an the general message. I don't encourage suicide or even self injury, but this was a very good write. Congratulatons on this piece and good luck in the contest. -
I believe your comment Lisa, I know you aren't going to commit suicide. The poem was great, and the imagery was AWESOME!! But the poem was . . . dark for my taste, but I still liked it. Ya know what I mean? I wish I could help you in some way, because I also know that in some way this poem is true. I know you kinda feel this way sometimes, and it pains me to see or read about it. Just know that you have people who LOVE you, in HIGH and LOW places. MAINLY ME!! Well anyway, great write.
With Love,
ArchAngel -
lol sorry I was laughing at your comment, even if you were going to commit suicide I wouldn't rat you out or anything because I think to do something like that is dumb. Anyway, I like this poem because it obviously gets your point across, and probably would if the people you're talking about were to read it too. It's racy and I love the line "crocodile tears on her pillow" it's just so weird but it totally fits the poem. Good Luck ~Sarah~
Adding your comment:
1 - 12 of 12
9 old applause
