broken samisen
abandoned on tatami
wind sighing through strings
futon tossed aside
sharp dust pattern remaining
motes begin to fall
orange shape sliding
through pool to decking shadow
carp sucks at surface
brush rolls on table
forgotten calligraphy
momentary ink
grey gravel garden
moss-grown rock meditating
birds play on sand trails
Author notes
Written November 14th, 2005
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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Lovely traditional haikus!
These are all really beautiful- thanks for increasing my knowledge on this subject in such an enjoyable way.
I will have these in mind next time I write a hokku.
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Thank you. To be honest I can see a lot of faults with this set (they are early ones). Most of them on this page are not so much three lines as three bullet-points, and not what I would hope to write these days.
But I am very glad you enjoyed them.
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Beautiful!
I am trying to become Haiku ... "One With Haiku". Not a Native American for sure. I will read more of your great works!
KC
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Glad you like them
And I am so dissatisfied with these!
(KC?)
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so zen
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The more I look back at these, Marion, the less satisfied I am, and the more convinced I am that I missed the mark. I like the fourth one here, and i think it could stand alone.
I am very appreciative of your opinion and praise, however. I am glad you went looking for these, and brought them back to my attention.
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hmmmm....I love haikus.Yours were great.
Shahrzad -
My blog page: spaces.msn.com/Mairibheag/
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Hi 5D - I have loads of questions about how things on the site work, but I need to know how they work to ask them! I haven't got the hang of IMs yet!
M -
Hi Myron - Awen has a web site. QL's address is: "Quantum Leap, 15 Argyle Tarrace, Rothesay, Isle of Bute, PA20 0BD, Scotland.
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that's gr8 news!!!!! congratulations - i'm very pleased for you.
i have a copy of "TIME HAIKU" - but i haven't heard of the other ones.
best wishes,
myron. -
Hi Myron - I just can't get the hang of how this site works! I have had the following nibbles from British publishers. 1. TIME HAIKU have said they will publish 3 lines of mine in their Aug 2006 issue; 2. AWEN is set to publish a humorous poem of mine in their issue #43 (Dec 2006); and 3. QUANTUM LEAP is set to publish this haiku and a sonnet in issue #35 or #36. The editor of QL really likes my stuff and may publish more.
M -
that's great. what's the name of the magazine?
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Thanks. I am afraid domestic circumstances have prevented me from posting anything else here for a while, but I am glad you enjoyed this little set. I have had a "nibble" of interest from a magazine for some of my haiku!
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Hey!!! These haiku are very good. So much is put in my imagination with such few words. Nicely done! Thank you so much for sharing your words with all of us here. Welcome to the site! If you have any questions or if I can be of any assistance please don't hesitate to send me or any greeter an IM.
♥FifthD♥ve♥
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welcome
enjoyed reading these haiku...welcome to the site...these are a good introduction to your work.
my favourite ones were 2 & 3:
futon tossed aside
sharp dust pattern remaining
motes begin to fall
orange shape sliding
through pool to decking shadow
carp sucks at surface
the attention to detail in the clear and vivid images of the futon haiku is wonderful.
i look forward to reading more of your haiku.
all the best,
myron.
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