Your elegant face,
and graceful body.
It's a magnificent place,
for destruction of mind.
The tragedy of mine,
my thoughtless desire.
Your silent sighs,
are porcelain fire.
Our horrid activities,
and mindless play,
are tranquil entities,
and Peaceful absence of you,
today.
Author notes
Option One with Option Two title.
Since you've been out of my life i have calmed down and been out of trouble. Dont come back to me.
Written November 12th, 2005
A contest entry
- No Trophies? by zillion.
300 points, ended November 15, 2005, 3 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Poems for my wall by Lauren Noir.
650 points, ended August 31, 2007, 83 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This was nice, it was beautifully put, not just stamped down infront of me. Just beautifully put in a beauituflly broken way
The beauty of description was amazing and the emotion was really well put in, just in the right way
I loved the last stanza, it was amazing
Couldn't have ended any other way
Clever title and interprutaiton
Well done
Good luck
Thanks for entering -
Beautiful and haunting words. I love the description and feel of this piece. Great poem, good luck in the contest, and keep on writing!
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this is a very well written peice with lots of emotion. I can tell it is written from personal experience. The ryhme was a little rough around the edges, but it's hard to get right off so I commend you for using it in your poetry. It is alot harder to write, and I personally enjoy it a lot more. "
Your silent sighs,
are porcelain fire."
I really enjoyed those two lines alot. I tried to use(give you words) that were mainly descriptive words because it makes the poem a lot more meaningful. Thanks for entering,
-Faithful Dreamer
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thank you. It was relatively easy to write this poem because a lot of weird things have been happening lately. I never knew that when i started writing that people would actually like it. Thank you again.
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I liked the shift of perspective at the end. The first stanzas were descriptive and visual and then the last one brought it all together with a though-provoking twist. Bravo.
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