Funeral (Acrostic)
Sad, sad eyes filled with tears
Over grandma, full of years,
Lying silent in her casket,
Open lid like in a basket.
Daughter tries to comfort grandchild,
Overwhelmed by feelings gone wild,
Very hard to tell her that old
Nana is now lying ice-cold.
In her rest she looks so playful,
Kidding with all that is tearful,
Only this time she's not joking,
Victor knows she died from smoking.
© Jim T. Henriksen
November 11th, 2005
Author notes
This poem is written for Zonia's contest "What do you see/feel..." I commented on "Eulogy" by Timebot, "Gone is the Pain" by Laura Lamarca, "The Trial" by lencio-sunchild, and "Ellis Island Immigrant" by NoWayJo.
Written November 11th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- What do you see/feel.... PICTURE CONTEST by Anna Emkah.
300 points, ended November 16, 2005, 6 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 35 of 35
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Hi, Shahrzad! Sorry, I didn't notice your comment earlier. Don't worry, you'll manage a rhyming acrostic some day!
Thanks for the comment! 
Jim
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Hi, Roz! I know, it's a sad poem. Glad you liked it, though! Thanks for the comment! Jim
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Fab job you done of this one, Jim! I almost feel I shouldn't say it tho coz it's such a sad subject...but a great write's a great write lol.
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A great write.
It's still soon to write for me such a thing.
Shahrzad -
Hi, sis! Thank you very, very much for your wonderful comment! Yes, you know what they say, it's all in the eye of the beholder.
Thanks for the standing ovation and applause! 
Jim
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Excellent work!!!
Jim, Excellent work you penned here bro. Love how you took the artist's name as the subject of your Acrostic. When I looked at the painting here on your page before reading I thought it resembled something Norman Rockwell would do.
The message you conveyed so wittily at the end rang loud and clear. Your rhyming and rhythm were excellent which made for perfect flow. It is amazing how we can all look at a picture and see something totally different than the person standing next to us. You really did a terrific job in writing this and along with a standing ovation and applause, you have my very best wishes in the contest. Love and blessings for the family, today and always. Joyce
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Hi, Frederick! Well, I guess they saw the bold letters, but didn't understand that it was the name Solodovnikov, the painter of the image. Sorry if the bold letters became a distraction, but a general rule in acrostics is that the acrostic word should be marked some way... Thanks for a long and detailed comment, in fact a great analysis of the poem. For that, I'm applauding your comment! Jim
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Hmmm...it took people some time to see the "bold" letters?..
...they almost became a real distraction for me...however, it is clever...yet, it doesn't stop the force of the actual work...this poem/poet provides us here with an excellent example of how a poem can deliver of message/feeling/sense with power yet an artfully delivered presentation of its ultimate contents' message ...and, here, it wafts up around the receiver, subtle in its movements and play, as the piece moves on to its closure, were the wisps of clouds have formed a binding that we have been equistely set up for, thick enough in its meaning that when pulled quite tightly at the end,it is swift, sharp, clean and smooth, like a free fall through an opened spot in an execution platform, we choke...smoke was the filmy clouds about and smoking The End!
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Hi, Jo! You know what they say, it's all in the eye of the one seeing... Victor could very well be the husband of Nana, or maybe the oldest son. He seem to be angry though, don't you think?
Thanks for the comment! Jim
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you know Star...I'm starting to see your interpretation of this image more in your poem than my own. brb, I gotta change my Ellis Island images! LOL
I really like what you drew from the image...this could very well be the very scene of a funeral coming to end at the church, and this man "Old Victor," being the husband. really interesting interpretation...shows that many witnesses to the same scene will always relate to it differently!
take good care, and good luck in the contest to you!!!
Jo -
Hi, wbiro! Thanks for the comment, my friend! Jim
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Hi, Porchi! Thanks for the comment, my friend. Send me an IM about what your campaign was, and I will see what I can do... Jim
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Hi, broadsword310!
The painting was not from a funeral, but from a court? Funny how the imagination can create a new interpetation of something. Now, if there had been a judge, or a court clerk, or a police officer in the picture, I would have figured it out. Thanks for the comment, though! Jim
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Hi, WolfAngel! You were caught by surprise for the ending?
Glad you liked it! Jim
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Hi, epitaph-macabre! I am amazed that my poems can do that to the readers... Thanks for the comment, and the applause! Jim
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Hi, Debbie! Yes, when that last line came to me, I knew it was the right one... If you can't decide to laugh or cry, then laugh till you cry.
Thanks for the comment, and the applause! Jim
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Hi, transcendental baby! I am glad you liked my poem! Jim
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Hi, Lencio! I am so glad you liked my poem, and the humorous touch to the end. Thanks for the comment, and the applause! Jim
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Hi, Anna! So you noticed it was an acrostic of the name of the painter? Well, since I made the first letters bold, it was just a matter of time before somebody noticed it, and told me so, or asked me what it meant. Thanks for the suggestions to that line, it really came in helpful... Glad you liked it though! Jim
Edited on Nov 12, 2:39 p.m. because ''. -
Hi, Linda! Yes, I guess there was a lecture to stop smoking, hidden in there somewhere. I just wish I would heed my own warning. Thanks for the comment! Jim
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Hi, sis! Thanks for the comment! I appreciate it! Jim
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Hi, Grams! I am glad you like the "punch" at the end... You don't smoke, I hope! Thanks for the comment! Jim
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Hi, Di! Allthough I smoke too, I do not recommend anybody to start... Thanks for the comment! Jim
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great take on the picture, and wild ending! Poor child...
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Nice..Good luck..you rock..great news that you have been made a greeter..Hope you will help me with my campaign..No reply from kevin yet..Good luck in the contest!
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what a clever acrostic using the name of the artist, a really good last line, also good to take the picture away from a court scene to a funeral, well done
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Was not expecting the ending..good one. Good luck in the contest
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i dont know if i should cry or giggle ....kinnda Odd that i felt both .....well done.
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This is really good...and the last line sure made me laugh...I'm reading this thinking ooohhh funeral they can be so sad then I get to the ending...it's amazing how one line can just really top it all...
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Oh what a cleaver humourous take on the picture
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Oh this is a marvellos job, very intelligent approach and well interpreted!!! Like Anna, I too love the humorous touch to the ending! As if you had to mention that lol!!! Well done!
Love and light,
Lencio -
An acrostic of the name of the painter from the image. Well done. The story is nice as well. It was a sad poem with a humoristic end. I see, you have changed a bit; it has become much better. Well done. Thanks for your entry Jim. Anna.
Edited on Nov 12, 1:20 p.m. because ''. -
I think you through it in full force..I like the way you did this one..good job..love sis..
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crystaldust 11-11-05 15:52
Love the last line, Jim, it really packs a punch. Like the rest of it as well. Short, classy and with a real sense of loss. Well done. Good luck with this one. grams -
Hi my friend, neat little inversion on old and hold,lol, nice little poem and a warning to all of us that smoke, all the best in the comp, hugs Di
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