The thought of you flashed by me
And splashed into the gentle glimmer
Of the pool of bottled water below me
Where hollowed-out heartbeats
Breathe to be with you.
Subtle glimpses of stardom
In an inside-out sky
Dripped like a wind chime after a rainstorm
Then whispered notes of salvation
That stole my heart away
And buried it deep within the cotton melodies:
Ah-Nough-Neu... Ah-Nough-Neu-Neu...
A flash of light
A carousel
A flash of light
A dance
A dash of sweat
A dash of hope
A swirl of hungry hands
Mah-Moe-Loo... Mah-Moe-Loo-Loo...
A home inside of an exaggeration
Of what it means to live—
To live comprised of what it takes
To take and then to give.
A world behind the mask of beauty
Where imperfections
Taste just like heaven—
Where songs are conversations
That we share when we're alone
And everything else
Is just a muffled-up version
Of
I Love You... and I Love You Too...
Author notes
Yew-Yew-Row-Vwee-Woo?
Written November 10th, 2005
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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I woke up this morning to meet you...That must be it!
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I was stuck on a title for this for a long while and just went with a place butterflies live because they don't have a verbal form of cumminication about them... but they're beautiful nonetheless. So maybe if they don't need decipherable words to live and love, neither do we.
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Since I'm not all that crazy about free verse, I am even more surprised that I like this as well as I do. It's feels like flying but it comes down to the bare bones of love too. However, I am curious about the title since it seems to have no connection to the poem from what I see. Anyway, good job.
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where does one start, with a poem like this? This is an absolutely beautiful piece of writting, filled with serenity, acceptance and excitement. As a female this is a poem that speaks to the soul, and one that i can understand perfectly. What a wonderful write!!!!!!!!!!!
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Wow. This brightened my day! And I was doing alright, because I'd already determined the gray gnomes of doom and gloomy depression were not drowning me today.
This entire piece--the picture, background, layout, and content--was indescribably beautiful, with some very interesting imagery thrown in. It captivated me throughout, and I wish I could do it justice with my faltering praise...
"Where songs are conversations
That we share when we're alone"
Love that! -
This is good, man. I think you've written better, but that doesn't mean anything - it doesn't detract from this gem at all. Good job!
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Captivating in the large! This was so stinkin' beautiful. The previous commenter pointed out my favorite lines in the poem... What this really shows of you, though, is your versatility/creativity. Your poetry is always so fresh - so refresing.
Even though you probably weren't concentrating so much on metrics, this still has great metrical value . It seems to come natural to you.
Phew, I still can't get over the originality in this. The: Ah-Nough-Neu... Ah-Nough-Neu-Neu... and Mah-Moe-Loo... Mah-Moe-Loo-Loo... 's = brilliance.
Always -
Cor -
Beautifully written, some really great and striking lines: "In an inside-out sky
Dripped like a wind chime after a rainstorm"
"Where imperfections
Taste just like heaven—..."
wow, the idea of tasting imperfections, I must agree with everyone..great job. I liked how you organized it, two main stanzas and one spread out one, the different colors of the text, very creative.
cLouDs
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wonderfully beautiful...i dont know what to say that would be good enough for this poem because this is just an amazing write...great poem, i LOVE it!!
~Tainted ♥ -
Beautiful. I have to agree that this is probly one of your best. I've been waiting to read a good poem and this is not a good poem, this is a fantastic poem. Thanks for exceeding my expectations.
Sara -
wow... this was spectacular.. i wanna read more like this, it was amazing!
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amazing
I don't know if I can do this poem justice by writing about it. The imagrey is incredibly original but it makes perfect sense.
Great job, I think this is one of your best.
And everything else
Is just a muffled-up version
Of
I Love You... and I Love You Too...
Adding your comment:
1 - 12 of 12
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