War,
My war;
inside me.
Get in the trench,
bombs explode!
Oh, the craters they leave,
scaring my heart forever.
the shackles on my remaining limbs
cut into my skin,
making it raw.
the chains hold me there
behind enemy lines.
in that dark stuffy
wet
dungeon,
I'm a prisoner of war
Who is the captor that I hate?
I want to kill her
she has caused this pain
Who has locked me here?
she should sit in this place
the hatred that I reach towards her
cannot compare to the hatred
that I leave to reach in me.
I have raged war against my body, my soul
my mind.
I have battle scars that are faint.
no one can see them but me,
but they're there...
Author notes
This was inspired by Lavander Shadow's muse #5, and the song Hero by Superchick.
Written November 10th, 2005
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1 - 10 of 10
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Interesting take on lavender's war muse- the war within oneself... it does remind us that there is war on many levels!
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you can applaud four works a day without loseing points...
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Thank you. I don't see myself as a good writer, ironically, I've kept my writing hidden up until last week...
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This poem is wonderful! I never read this sort of poem... Its so good! I loved your use of words. I love the part where you said Oh, the craters they leave,
scaring my heart forever.
the shackles on my remaining limbs
cut into my skin,
making it raw.
I hope yo ucontinue writing for a very very very long time. You are one of the really good poets I know so far. Your poems are awesome, too. Keep it up, I hope to read more from you soon! -
good
i reread this a couple of times and now that im fully awake it makes sence and its awesome the layout is awesome as well applause worthy -
The punctuation was a bit off but otherwise it was a very enjoyable piece.
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A wonderful write here princess, we all wage our own private little wars and fight our own private little battles. Battle scars can be carried deep within a person and the only time they are seen by others is when we choose to reveal them. External scars fade with time but are never completely gone, but the internal ones are the ones we carry as reminders for the rest of our lives. They never fade, the only difference is they can not be clearly seen.
The wording and lay out of this poem are excellent and tell the poem more vividly, wonderful work
Sapphire
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Very very insightful and well written. Pick yup right now and forgive yourself for any harm you may have caused yourself with any war or battle scars. You are the only you you will ever have, and you are a precious soul, made in the image of God and a lovely lovely girl. Your spirit rings thru in this loud and clear, and you need to always nurture it and it clear.Blessings hon.
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thank you I really like your columns, not all of them will produce a great poem for me, but this one helped.
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Really good job on this write! You've taken this piece exactly where I was hoping someone would... drawing similarities between say "regular" war, and a war within ourselves. Your imagery at the beginning of the poem really emphasized this. Wonderful job!
~lavender shadows~
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