Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

My Search for Serenity

Missing image

 




In my search for serenity I fall into a catatonic state
and I am lured into temptation by zephyrs playing the violins of love.


 

I lean into the wind and weather the cycle of love-hate-love
as the trees bend, but not in any sympathy for me.


 

Gradually the storm passes and the music stops,
and in the forest clearing a firefly alights
on the nose of an onyx dragon wearing a worn saddle.


 

I am beckoned forward. In the saddle I find carved, ‘sweet serenity’
and the number '9'. I wait, and I wait,
tracing the letters over and over again in my mind.


 

She arrives on the edge of the clearing and hesitates.


 

The temptation, the catatonic state, the zephyrs and the violins,
the howling winds leaned into, the cycle of love-hate-love,
the firefly and the onyx dragon all dissipate in the mist.


 

and we are left alone
in silence.



Author notes

Contest Notes:
I chose option 3) In 20 lines or less, using ALL  of the following words to write about any subject.

temptation
serenity
catatonic
violin
lean
cycle
firefly
onyx

pic from an online coloring book!
sommerland.org/ondragons/interactive/colouring.html
Written October 28th, 2005

In a list

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • wbiro gold member
    October 29, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Mmmm, I'm pleased you enjoyed it... and please excuse me while I linger on your lingering in the forest clearing for a while, Ms. Soul... and thanks for the congrats!


  • Lyrical Soul silver member
    October 29, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    What beautiful imagery you have woven into this masterpiece. I came back to this contest out of curiosity as to who won. I was so pleased to see it was you This is very well crafted and left me lingering in the silence with you. Congratulations on your win.

    ~Lyrical


  • Celticmoon
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Bravo!

    I am impressed! Your ability to weave such a wondrous web of intrigue amazes me beyond words. I felt myself draw in from the first moment my eyes locked upon your words. A true artist you are... heart and soul.

    Good luck in the contest sweetie


    Blessings
    Bel


  • wbiro gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    my 'official' thank you, my fluffy ball of Chrissiness!


  • wbiro gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Suseann! Thank you, glad to hear from you, and glad you enjoyed it...!


  • suseann
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Whow! This was amazing to say the least! You wrote a beauty here in fantasy and managed to use the word list expertly as well.I loved this piece!~~Suseann


  • wbiro gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    thank you, queenie...!


  • lavender shadows
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is incredible Dad! I love how you somehow managed to weave those words into here as though they were everyday expressions, without the slightest bit of awkwardness. You did a truly fabulous job on this! Best of luck to you!

    me


  • queenie
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    the pieces that this one hour contest has brought out are truly phenomenal and to say yours is among the best is an understatement.there is much to love about this.my best to you in the contest.


  • wbiro gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Well, thank you, Amunet, for the chance to put off some work! (and for an impetus for a pleasant write!)

  • wbiro gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Glad to hear from you, Melissa... hmmm... love, now where did I mention that... oh yes... lines 2, 3, and 13... OK, you got me!


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Exactly! Very powerfully penned. In few lines you have built an essence that I'm sure will haunt me many nights. This is phenominal! Blessings, Gypsy

    P.S. And the pic...I absolutely adore!

  • Melissa Gayle gold member
    October 28, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Fabulous - I love your style, it is so unique and intriguing. This piece speaks of the sweetness of found love, the pleasure, the elation - the very feeling. Wonderful.

1 - 13 of 13