summer doesn’t last
longer than
the fleeting moments
of pure
untainted exhilaration
in the autumn rains
art thrives
as the eternal
shelter of the unloved
suffering from
melancholy
paint the world red
and the clouds will burst
with the misery
we hold deep within our cores
if more
than a few meaningless words
find their way out
ceaselessly
they will be followed
by apathetic
indifference of the minds
by the next summer
the cynical will have won
over the world
perhaps
the cheerful whispers
will resume
but to no satisfaction.
longer than
the fleeting moments
of pure
untainted exhilaration
in the autumn rains
art thrives
as the eternal
shelter of the unloved
suffering from
melancholy
paint the world red
and the clouds will burst
with the misery
we hold deep within our cores
if more
than a few meaningless words
find their way out
ceaselessly
they will be followed
by apathetic
indifference of the minds
by the next summer
the cynical will have won
over the world
perhaps
the cheerful whispers
will resume
but to no satisfaction.
Author notes
Wrote that during the summer, dreading the dreary fall and winter days. I suppose this will be understood better by those who live in a climate with a lot of rain, rather than eternal sunshine. But at the very core, I'm sure all can relate.
I appreciate any feedback at all, whether it's something technical, or just you sharing your emotions and feelings.
Written August 1st, 2005
A contest entry
- New by lively banter.
300 points, ended November 15, 2005, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PreWrites! by Menna.
700 points, ended July 29, 30 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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Very Touching!!!
Looks like you are keeping your word and not posting any poems at all. I suppose a Goddess has to keep her words or else!!! Coming to this poem, we dread the sunshine as it is too hot during summer here in India. Winter is equally bad as we are not sued to the cold either. So it is the period in between that makes our day, kind of twisted right?
You have a way with words and express your emotions in such a way that it touches the very soul. People can get to the core of your words and feel them for themselves. It is a pity that you will not post anymore. But can a mortal man question the Goddess?
Love and blessings from India - Joel -
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very pretty all the way throughout. I enjoyed the read. which makes me wonder: are you still committed to not posting here anymore?
Lea -
Oh, I forgot to say this: crap crap crap crap crap crap.
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Very nice job, this is an excellent poem. First off, I liked your word play in the title. That was pretty clever. You have great vocabulary and you use it well by creating wonderful images with your figurative language. I liked how you took a basic idea in this poem (dreading the change in the weather) and expanded it to something bigger. You gave a new life with your creative ideas which gave the poem more meaning to it. I also liked that you were creative with your format. It adds more interest to the poem. I can relate to this poem since I too dread the rain even though it probably doesn't rain as much here as it does where you live. Thank you for entering in my contest, good luck and keep up the good work.
~Kevin -
this is absolutely amazing..best of luck to you in the contest..i look forward to reading more from you in the future
1 - 5 of 5




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