silently
I read your words
on the open page
your emotions running
onto my sleeve
Andrew Hide
14~10~2005
Author notes
Allpoetry school tanka class.
allpoetry.com/
Written October 14th, 2005
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that's a funny idea-- someone else's emotions turning into your own tears. good job.
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what about reading your words on the monitor screen? i dont know much about these forms of poetry.. but your words always touch the readers heart.
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Very moving...
This is a wonderfully touching 3-4-5-6-4 tanka. It brought tears to my eyes. The pivot line, L3, has blended the upper part (Kaminoku) and the lower part, (Shimonoku) of the tanka very well. I think the fact that you used only 1 -ing word is also very nice because this is so short a poem, so too many -ing words would make it look real heavy. I really like and admire your tanka talent.
Best Wishes,
Charishma
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wow so beautiful
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yes ... it is lovely
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Wonderful Andrew.... good luck with the class.....
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