The Art of Decomposing In Glass Houses
"Powerless",
they called themselves,
sleeping under starless skies;
dreaming away the night
in infinite shades of yellow
and grey.
Self-proclaimed
"Victims of the Human Race",
they wept forty days and
forty nights,
drowning their own forsaken
dirt and blood
in flash-floods of pestilence.
But, I've cried longer
and I've hurt harder.
"Dear Heart," I recited to myself
kneeling in the all-
powerful shadow of their
humanistic God,
praying to taste His
religion--
it was sour
like rotting lemons
and did nothing to save me.
"Prepare to be eaten alive."
Since then, I've danced
to forbidden hymns,
feasted among famines,
and laughed
in the faces of their damned.
Since then, He's devoured
my innocence, crucified
my reality, and massacred
my salvation.
He told me once,
their so-called "prophet",
their pinnacle of flawlessness,
in a world built by the hands of accidents,
"I'm the tone-deaf, fear-
infested, shell of a sinner"--
and I scoffed at the inaccuracies of self-
diagnosis in the wake of over-
played tragedy.
Last night, I questioned
his despotic authority, cursed
his faith,
and left the congregation gaping.
Author notes
Written October 11th, 2005
A contest entry
- Just Give Me Something To Read by HerbalGoat.
300 points, ended January 18, 2008, 88 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Mania!! :D by XxLoverOfDarknessxX.
900 points, ended July 8, 87 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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LOVED IT! this was a really good piece.
keep up the good work! thanks for entering and good luck in my contest!
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That was very good. I liked it. Thanks for entering.
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Very amazing write.
This is a poem that I wish that I could have created.
I love the title. It hooked me in at once. Very creative!
Very nice poem!
I'll be looking forward to seeing more by you.
-System of Cyanide
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a good piece of poetry - i thank you kindly for entering your poetic piece and good luck to you in this contest - spill ink and twist me into the crazy shape of love...
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:-) I don't even agree with the message, but I'm spellbound.
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Very Good
WWow this is a great write. It has immense depth, made me think quite a bit as to the possible meanings you were trying to get across. I dont' think i have read a finer poetic piece from one so young and really this is excellently written. You have a very fine grasp of vocabulary, grammar and the symbolism was interesting and unique at times. You use a few cliched phrases (we all use them, it's sometimes hard not too *smiling) that do not detract from the piece itself because you have managed to weave them into the stanzas effectively.
Great write, enjoyed reading it. -
Wow. I loved this poem. Your word choice and way of describing the situation was very creative, unique and original. I thoroughly enjoyed the read and hope you fared well in the contest
.
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mmhmm
A few words come to mind...brilliant, interesting, awesome (lol) and lots of others that I forgot already.
This is extremely well written. Definitley lots of big words that some I don't understand, lol. This is a great penning. Wonderful job, and good luck in the contest!
Jeanette*~ -
wow.. i really dont know what to say .. just wow.. this is a short comment i know but not bc i havent put thought into it or bc im lazy but rather ur vocabulary,syntax, and imagery have left me speechless.. brillant..
Yours,
FlavoredPoison -
Oh yes. I hope to see many more entries of this nature. You could just spank me happy right about now. lol.
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hey, i really think this poem is great, it's so full of imagery and symbolism! the emotion throughout the enitre poem is amazing! you started strong and ended even stronger
my fav part was
But, I've cried longer
and I've hurt harder.
so true! like one of the other comments says i really think this poem is different from alot of other poems ( that i've read at least) because the symbolism is so thick, and it's also very opininated. anyways awesome just
gina -
Lovely use of language and imagery, but I felt that it was maybe too symbol heavy. That the meaning behind it was somehow lost a little.
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I loved this poem. The imagery was perfect and incredibly captivating. And the anger that you expressed was so vivid that it kept the reader wanting to know more. Keep up the great work, and best wishes in the contest.
~Laura~
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i am not usually this effusive i looooooooooove this. it reminds me a hell of a lot of the way i used to write. i thoroughly enjoyed this and i will be hoping to read more of your work
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great!
This is a brilliant poem that you really have to think on. I love it! This poem is really unique and stands out from so many others that i've read. Really, great job!!! -
Very entertaining poem to read. Some of the words hit me really hard, your lines were so unique and original. I'm a little confused at the overall meaning, but I think I got the gist. Excellent poem, very captivating.
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Hmm, I'm not quite sure I understand what this is about, but it did have some really artistic parts in it that I really enjoyed..
Thanks for entering my contest and for your comment! Good luck!
Ostara. -
my god!! this is brilliant. unbelievable!!there is so much of i that i loved, esp Since then, I’ve danced
to forbidden hymns,
feasted among famines,ect. that verse is very powerful. and a steong ending. Brilliant!!!
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