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Extinguished Light


Fingered deep through flannel den,
tattered
front shirt pocket.

Retrieving
life’s last treasure.


Pressed cold
metallic memories
to dampened, tired cheek.
Initials’ etching’s
tracing
my final farewell.

Ushered from stark
baren intensive care

Given a single
Translucent bag,
possessions
Death’s concessions


My father’s memories
Clutched within  
Tarnished
Flameless
Zippo

Author notes

My father died with little to no material possesions, except for the things found in his pockets.  One of them was an old zippo that he had as long as I can remember.
Written October 4th, 2005

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 7 of 7
  • moonstruck
    December 17, 2005
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    Wow. very interesting and intense. Some of the lines are particularly impressive and your authors notes brought the poem to new life as I read it for a second time. So personal, you created the scene. Fantastic write.


  • UndyingLazarus
    October 6, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I remember how much I loved the first poem I read about your deceased father, love this as well. Glad you're writing again. Love the line "cold metallic memories to dampened tired cheeks" and the lovely ending "tarnished/flameless/zippo." Keep them coming.


  • befree
    October 6, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    MuddyKing, thanks for your comment. This contest woke some dormant creativity. I hadn't written anything in a few weeks, thanks for the idea.
    -free


  • MuddyKing
    October 6, 2005
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    Very heart felt piece here, and images drenched with clarity. The perfect title as well. I see beauty in the Zippo, something I wouldn't have seen if not for this contest. Exactly what I was hoping for
    Peace Muddy


  • dogsamongus
    October 5, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Very touching and bittersweet. You keep his memory alive through your writing and so he's never really that far away. Beautiful.

  • Lotus Flower
    October 5, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is so very sad it is filled with emotion.I feel your pain. Great piece Free, you never dissapoint. Good luck! ~M~


  • DawnBaby
    October 4, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    This is so good, so reminds me of my brother's death, we took home his T shirt, and jeans, he had 2 pennies in his pocket, nothing else. Great job, brought back my own grief, when a write makes me feel, it HAS to be good!

1 - 7 of 7