Somber
clouds boil, claps of
thunder shake the earth as
spider webs of light rent the sky,
storm blows.
Cool winds
ruffle leaves of
fire, October weeps
as ebon clouds release their moist
salvo.
Author notes
Double Cinquain
Written October 3rd, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- October Weeps (photo contest) by Bigmammajen.
500 points, ended October 8, 2005, 12 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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An interesting approach to rainy weather. Yes, just last night we had rain that seemed more like a bombardment that a raining. So I can identify with your poem.
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Aweosme
The IMAGERY WAS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!I loved this -
don't know how you do these
i've tried in the past
never worked
you've got it though
this is great! -
beautiful~
And you said your muse was gone
This is a beautiful cinquain sis just like you
Best of luck in the contest
Love ya muchly
Your sis
Susan~~~
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thats the most pretty end there can be sissy, and most wonderful cinqain anyone can write! Love it.. keep writing
~ Evenstar
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You have really done well with this form. I enjoy a well written cinquain, and this is just that...only double the pleasure. Beautiful imagery.
Sam
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I am glad to finally see a new poem from you dear--I thought you had retired from writing!
Your choice of diction is, as always, perfect to describe the situation. You have made October weep (which it will, where I live, very soon) with brilliant imagery. Your talents keep amazing me. This has all the grace of a thunderstorm, commanding, yet beautiful. My best wishes to you in the contest, dear one.
Many blessings,
Raven Aurora
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I love this it is so different I love the diction so different then what i have seen lately. I love the spider web light description. This is exceptional. Thank you for sharing. Good luck in the contest.
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I love cinquain
great work on these.
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excellent poem
As far as I am concerned your muse never really left, just went to sleep to dream up the poetry you have here. This is really an excellent double conquain! If I were judging....Any way lots of luck! -
Perhaps she is. I'm not singing the "Hallelujah Chorus" just yet. Keeping those fingers crossed.
s and ♥
Sally
bats her eyes at you....loves you to Lovey
Edited on Oct 03, 5:56 p.m. because ''. -
And indeed, this is truly one magnificent double cinquain you have posted my dear I don't know what you think, but this one shows some signs of your muse coming back, doesn't it
awesomely stunning poem... really... perfect!
Leander
loves his Madame Mystress
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Thank you so much for your wonderful comment. I feel that my muse might be coming back.
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Yippee!!! I get to be the first to comment on this astonishing pair of cinquains!!!! "...spider webs of light rent the sky..."
WOW!!! What a gorgeous line that is!!! SOOOOOO happy to see you posting!! I really missed your beautiful writing style. This is absolutely breath taking!!! I wish you the best in this contest!!! Karen
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