In a sea of little waves
You are
The big wave
The unexpected one
That knocked me off my feet
Covered over me
As I tumbled underneath
You chaffed my knees and then
Healed them with your salt
While the ocean pounded my eardrums
And said in her deafening voice
"This... is not a choice"
You are
The big wave
Author notes
Written October 2nd, 2005
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1 - 5 of 5
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awww this is so sweet. but you have written stuff like this before with no one in mind so tell me is there someone now
huh huh I wanna know lol
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excellent!
this is the perfect example of using metaphor. it's a beautiful write... and i'm sure many readers can relate to this feeling of being swept away (completely and totally) by love. -
Mooo Frog. Once again, hit me in my EM. Sniff Sniff-no, not me, must be my allergies....
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This is not cliche at all, this is just pure awesomeness. I really liked your metaphore and your use of language. You did a great job. I only have one suggestion, I think it might be better to change the comma to an ellipses. I think it would be more effective, but that is just my opinion. Either way, this is really good
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This kind of reminded me of my situation! great write i liked how you related yourself and her as waves and we are in one big ocean!
1 - 5 of 5




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