Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

fabricland conversation

in a semi-empty parkinglot
outside of fabricland
(you with your diet coke + banana bread)
[me with my carrots + protein bar]
we discuss trivialities:
gossip, classes, sore abs + calves
and i realize how lost i am

no more tangled sheets
and tangled feet on random tuesday nights
are we closer because of this
distance between our teeth?
more desire to bite upon arrival?

Author notes

not quite...finished, i guess. it doesn't really end.....a miscellanous thought from a random lunchtime monday occurance
Written September 21st, 2005

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • Prism
    April 22, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    but why is it it seems when you try and be not so close, you are closer than before? err am i about to have a poetic inspiration, yesh?

  • dim halo
    September 29, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    wow, sarra
    I haven't read any of your poems for such along time.. I only now discovered what I was missing.

    are we closer because of this
    distance between our teeth?
    more desire to bite upon arrival?

    i have an idea what this is about... so I truly like the words you have used... it's as if i could have felt this myself. Excellent, darling
    Always
    Roxanne


  • butterflyinflight
    September 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    SARRA! I am so happy that you've posted!!!!!!!!!!! I like this. I like the brackets and the Tuesday and "more desire to bite upon arrival?" It makes me long to know the context of this. How are you doing? How are you doing in PG? I miss Literature class. Do you remember passing notes? Ha! So obviously.

    You are stupendous!

    - Rupert

  • anne
    September 21, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    i like days in poems. especially tuesdays. there is something about tuesdays that seems to incorporate an entirely tuesday-ish feel. completely adjectiveless. i'm so very very happy that you posted a poem. and this is so gorgeous. i like the brackets. and the questions and just everything.